I write not for the sake of glory,
Not for the sake of fame,
Not for the sake of success,
But for the sake of my soul.
[Rachel Joy Scott, 1981 - 1999]
So I've tried to keep journals before, and they've all ended up warped messes. I suppose that I was trying too hard to write what others would want of me if they ever read it, and not what I need to get off my chest. So here we go: with this, I'm going to (try) to keep a regular journal, writing how I feel, what's happened and so on. And more than anything, I need to be able to see the words on a page. I've tried writing for fame and glory. Now let's write for my soul.
Mood: Tired
Music: None
Talking to: Jason
So I got up today. Woke up to an impertinent beep, sounding from my mobile which was doused under unknown masses of bedsheets. Finally found it and switched it off, then managed to haul myself out of bed.
Padded through to the kitchen to check the time - 5:20. Then headed for a cold shower.
Got on here and looked through some threads and such. I noticed Cilla's journal and had a read through, then did what I've been meaning to do for a few weeks and made a new one of these. I really need a steady, serious journal. If not to suss out how I feel, then to record it. I think that, in five, ten years, I'll want to know how I felt in the past. Isn't the past how we learn of the future? That makes sense to me at least. Past mistakes educate us about what not to do in the future - only most of the time we ignore it, toss it aside because it is in the past.
So maybe I should give you a rough once-over on people who'll be appearing in this journal. They're all connected somehow, so pay attention. ><
First off, there's me, Lily. A few of you know my real name - not going to use it. I'm not fond of people with whom I've never conversed knowing it. Anyway, there's me. I am currently dating Ben (Taranic), who is a good friend of Callum who is dating Laura, my next door neighbour. Elissa, one of my close friends, dated Ben for a few months a couple of years back and is currently the closest friend of Merry (Twilight_wolf). Craven (Um, Crav3n) is friends with Ben, Callum and Laura, also with my good friend Jess. Froggie you should all know - she was also in the same circle as Elissa and I.
That should be it, I think. I could go on about how more of my acquaintances are interconnected with these people close to me (there are quite a few more), although I'd say that the phrase "It's a small world" would suffice. Haha.
Anyhow, I'm conceding the computer to my sister who is harassing me about getting some time online. So, I shall return later and edit this if there's anything new to be added.
EDIT:
Mood: Alright
Music: None
Talking to: Nathan, Cilla, Craven, Ann
Okay, so I got back on. I was reading over the book from which the opening quote came. It's called Rachel's Tears and is by Darrell Scott and Beth Nimmo. I've read it at least seven times, and the pages are prematurely brown from tear stains. Maybe I'm just over emotional, but it truly is worth reading. Basically, it's the biography of Rachel Joy Scott, one of the thirteen martyrs from the Columbine massacre. It cost me thirteen bucks AU, so if you have a bit of spare cash, you wouldn't be wasting it.
Anyway, I'm not out to start and advertising campaign. I'm off for now - again, will update if anything new happens.
Til then,
Lily
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