Evil, Inc. Application
Introduction:The Evil, Inc. application is the only way to apply for membership and to be accepted, you must pass a series of essay-like questions and then will be given a task after we have reviewed your answers. If you complete your task, you shall be given an internship where you shall continue to prove yourself to higher ranks. So before we continue, I shall give you an example of a typical question that will be found in this test.
Example-A: You have been ordered to assassinate a world leader, no questions asked. In the process of gathering information of the target and the target’s associates, you discover two things: the first being that the target has hired an assassin to take out the assassin who’s going to take him out (you), and two, the target’s hired assassin is someone from your past you loved very much, but had remembered this special someone had died. Putting aside clichés such as ‘I’mz cold hearted, lol’ or ‘I would go back to this special someone’, how would you now go about killing your target with or without killing the other assassin and why?
So as you can see, each question written in this test will require you to answer using your experience of evil. It shall evaluate who you are and how you stand in the evil community.
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Question 1: Personality: In this scenario, you are a successful villain. You have plenty of henchmen, a country that loves you, money, and enough power that the rest of the world ignores you in fear of retaliation. How did you obtain this position and why?
Question 2: Creativity and Efficiency: You’re short on cash, so you do the next most obvious thing; rob a bank. The bank itself is one of the largest chains and has stored 10 million in normal cash, 30 in marked ‘smart’ bills, and 15 mil in electronic credit stored in large hard-drives with the deadliest firewall. The bank itself sits next to the most public tourist attraction in the city and inside has 50 guards, 30 of them paid and 20 experienced security officers with military background. The vault itself has 20 cameras and security systems you’d see in Mission Impossible. You yourself only have five henchmen and the basic tools needed to rob any bank. Tell us how you could rob this bank in the most quick and creative way you can within a believable scenario.
Question 3: Ethics: You’ve done it. You have finally snapped and are looking for some sense in closure by getting on top of a tall building and taking out people below with a sniper rifle. (Think New York city as you are looking down onto a typical shopping corner.)
As you sit there searching for the ‘right’ person, 5 people catch your eye. There’s an old lady with her huge oxygen tank while sitting on a bench in front of a diner and she’s whacking some youth on the head with her purse. Across the street is some Jewish rich boy in a designer’s hoodie listening to his iPod and is about to enter a liquor store. Behind the old lady is a white trash mom talking to some guy about weed while she ignores her twin baby girls sitting in a baby cart. In the traffic near the farthest light, you can see a balding fat black man smoking a cigarette as he curses at the skinny trucker carrying dangerous chemicals. Lastly, next to the liquor store is a the beauty salon where a gay man stands on his smoke break
With only 3 bullets to spare, who do you kill, in what order, and why?
Question 4: Abilities: If you had to choose a set of abilities (only two) you would use to take over the world, what would they be, how did you obtain them, how do you use them, and why?
Question 5: Armageddon: It’s the end of the world and all that most villains would love to gain is being destroyed by other villains who only want death. As a villain yourself that ironically treasures life as to death: what would be your final accomplishments, how would you die, and in a sort of Deus Ex Machina scenario, would you become a hero or commit a minor heroic act in order to save the world? And why?
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