I must say I agree with Shelus. There is DEFINATELY a lot of revision that needs to be done here. Try doing it on Microsoft Word first to correct the grammatical and spelling errors. That alone should help your case. Also, needs more of a description to it. Personally, I'd say you aren't ready to join the Masters. Not by a long shot, however, I would be glad to give you a second chance to show your worth. Not that my opinion really matters on the subject....