Do you feel gay when washing a cucumber?

[RagnaToad]

Every time I wash a cucumber I feel awkward. It looks like I'm jerking it off or whatever.

So do you get uncomfortable when washing a cucumber or other phallus-shaped objects?

[Rocky]

I kinda do feel gay when I'm washing off a cucumber, now that you mention it.

I feel like I'm pleasuring myself when I wash off a stalk of celery though.

[Unknown Entity]

I can't feel gay when I wash a cucumber. Go me!

The thought that I'm jerking off someone else's cucumber has crossed my mind when I do though.

[Meier Link]

I don't feel gay when I wash off a cucumber, not in the least. Now for weiners, aka polish sausage I feel a little disturbed when cleaning off one of those things. I know it is a meat product and the quick rinse is not required but the extra moistness is nice when seasoning. Now this is taking a turn for the worse because I am going to say that I use 2 different types of rubs on polish sausages......

Now that you mention the cucumber thing I feel dirty and will think of doing something inappropriate when washing one of those off. Lets just hope that the cucumber likes the motion in that ocean.

:edit: this post is full of epic win.

[Polk]

It's only gay if you decide to go down on the cucumber.

[Furore]

It's never been a problem for me as I don't like teh cucumber.
So long as someone doesn't point out something is particularly penislike I'm generally fine though my reaction on finding a mishapen potato that looked like a **** and balls had me laughing pretty hard, especially after playing some practical jokes with it.

[Dodie16]

I'm in the same boat as Entity. Not gay for us in the slightest, but I suppose it can still be a bit dirty. Though I do wonder what the female equivalent would be?

[Che]

I'm in the same boat as Entity. Not gay for us in the slightest, but I suppose it can still be a bit dirty. Though I do wonder what the female equivalent would be?

^ I don't even know what that is.

[Rocky]

It's only gay if you decide to go down on the cucumber.

That's not how you are supposed to wash it????

[Clint]

Who the hell washes cucumbers? All you have to do is dump it in a pickling solution of brine or vinegar. Of course, if you sniff the cucumber after it's been pickled, you're gay.

[The Dark Crystal]

I have washed plenty of cucumbers in my life, but I have never gotten that gay feeling. One time it did cross my mind, but that was due to the fact that my uncle said "You jerking that vegetable Son". I did take a huge bite out of one last month and that kinda striked me as a gay feeling!

[Unknown Entity]

^ I don't even know what that is.

That looks like an oyster or some other marine delicacy. I've never seen one, but now I know why it's best to have a big tongue to eat them.

EDIT:

Now that you mention the cucumber thing I feel dirty and will think of doing something inappropriate when washing one of those off. Lets just hope that the cucumber likes the motion in that ocean.

Also, Meier's post reminded me about that part in Jackass when they "masturbate" with sea cucumbers. I'd post a link, but I'm unsure if it's appropriate... even though I've seen worse. >>;

[BigWill]

I've never been a big fan of cucumbers. I'm starting to think now that its a subconscious thing. But its the same way with bananas now that you mention it.

For some odd reason I'm starting to crave oysters.......

[GypsyElder]

What is this "gay" you speak of ?

[BigWill]

What is this "gay" you speak of ?

Its this happy feeling some guys get when washing a cucumber.....

[OceanEyes28]

I feel pretty awkward eating a banana while people are watching. I always feel like I'm at an audition.

[Maridia]

Can't say I feel gay when washing a cucumber.

I do find mayo disturbing though. Never liked it as a kid on sandwiches and as I got older seeing commercials with people licking gobs of white goo off their fingers....just too weird for me.

[GypsyElder]

I feel pretty awkward eating a banana while people are watching. I always feel like I'm at an audition.

have you ever tried eating a big stick without feeling awkward? it's almost impossible



"Speak softly and carry a big stick" ?

Theodore Roosevelt was a perv

[Polk]

"Speak softly and carry a big stick" ?

Theodore Roosevelt was a perv

I can shed some light on this. Teddy Roosevelt loved him some ice cream. Whenever we would go out hunting, we'd have to take a cooler (which at the time was a box with a block of ice in it), and it was always full of ice cream. Long story short, it became cumbersome to just carry around a bunch of ice cream, so I invented the Big Stick, and thus, the popsicle, for easier travel. No, I don't care what google or wikipedia says. That's how it happened. Fucking deal with it. Anyway, it became his motto for hunting, was that we needed to speak softly so the animals didn't hear us, and carry around big sticks. We carried the cooler around anyways because Teddy loved to slaughter baby animals, and keep the hearts.

True story.

On topic: I may have to go into oyster farming. No particular reason.

[Storm]

I haven't felt awkward washing a cucumber or a courgette, and obviously I can't feel gay because of it. However I have had odd looks where i've ripped into a banana and devoured the lot at lightspeed. It's normally on the last bite I feel a little self-conscious. Oh, and with hotdogs, which I only really eat if theres nout all else in the college canteen.

[Block]

I get uncomfortable not washing phallic like objects.

[RamesesII]

I don't wash, down the hatch and away it goes.

[bahamuts heir]

Only if I think about it as a ****
otherwise it's just food
damn that sounded gay

[Che]

Only if I think about it as a ****
otherwise it's just food
damn that sounded gay

It sure did. Let's go make a panic at the disco thread to redeem yourself.

[Pete]

Nope, never thought of it as gay. I've always kinda thought "hey, now I'm getting the dirt and pesticides off my food, SWEET!"

But thanks, fags. You've corrupted this mind.

[Rocky]

It sure did. Let's go make a panic at the disco thread to redeem yourself.

Remember Che, I never said I missed her when everybody kissed her, now I'm the only one to blame...

[Josh_R]

I don't eat cucumbers, therefore I never wash them. But something tells me that if I did wash one I would feel great...

It sure did. Let's go make a panic at the disco thread to redeem yourself.

Now Che thats not nice. Not everyone are die hard Coheed fans like ourselves.

[LIGHTNING_71013]

i dont wash cucumbers as a whole because i dont eat the whole thing all at once. i would usually cut off the amount that i want...and wash that. but i dont feel weird or anything.