Is commiting suicide a selfish personal act

[Assassin]

People think that commiting suicide is the solution to everything. I know that calling a person who commits suicide selfish is not right because we dont really know what they went through but why does this have to be the way out. I wouldn't call it cowardly because it takes alot of courage but i want that people who think that this is the way out are wrong. It can be selfish because people u leave go through alot more pain than u have. Because of the pain the person who commits suicide gets mentally disturbed and they start getting negative thoughts and in the end they commit suicide so i think that any1 who is close to that person should comfort him/her and try their best to not let him/her make such dicision. Life is very precious and no one has any right to decide when to end it. But what do you think is right.

[nickness89]

I don't think it's selfish, but I do think that somebody who commits suicide hasn't generally had the empathy to think of how they are going to leave the ones they love feeling. A lot of suicidal people actually don't have anyone that would be left behind, but lots do, so this is a bit of a hard question. Personally, I think it's more stupidity (ready to be lynched for saying that) than selfishness. I was once suicidal, but luckily as I was on my way to a bridge, I found the ring in my pocket that my mum gave me for my birthday that had just passed, and I realised how stupid I was, and decided to stop being such an ass, and face up to my problems, hit them head on and sort out everything.

Sometimes suicide can be done for selfish means though, I've read many stories about people that have attempted suicide to try and hurt other people and leave them feeling guilty, which is quite sickening tbh

[Yoko]

This is a very interesting topic. Mainly because I know first hand what thoughts of suicide can do to a person and others around them. I have been through them myself and I would NEVER wish this kind of pain onto anyone else. It is an absolutely awful experience.

Lucky for me, I was able to get out of it without the need for medication. But this isn't a story about me and my problems. It's whether or not this is selfish.

I was called selfish many many times during this phase. Perhaps I was. Perhaps my mental state was so bad, that's all my brain could think about. I really don't even think that was me looking back now. Whether or not I truly was selfish is really a toss up.

Stupidity is another thing that comes to mind. If by stupid you mean: not all there, you might actually be correct. By definition, one of it's meanings are 'Tending to make poor decisions or careless mistakes.' I made many many mistakes and made many many poor decisions. I did NOT have lack of intelligence during this time, which also falls under the definition of stupidity. I was fully aware of what was going on. The pain I was going through affected my mental state in a very bad way.

Most of the time I thought the world was better off without me (Don't bother telling me if that's a selfish thought. I was thinking of others). I had brought so many people down during this time. I was stuck in a rut. I was also digging my own hole and pushing people away. The only thing that prevented me from going over the edge was that there were friends out there that truly cared. They didn't see it as being selfish. They saw that I had a problem and wanted to help fix it. Little did I know that they actually were helping. It took a courageous phone call from someone who deeply cared to bring me out of it. One that I care not to explain.

Thoughts of Suicide is a depressed mental state of being. Nothing more, nothing less. If you need help, talk to someone. Don't let these feelings boil inside. That won't do any good for anyone.

Now, I suggest this thread be closed before this topic gets out of hand. Suicide is a very touchy subject. I do NOT want this to get out of hand.

[Heartless Angel]

It is selfish in most cases (occasionally someone may have reasons that make it otherwise, but those cases are few and far between). It leaves your problems behind for others to deal with, and it leaves others to mourn for your death. It relieves you of pain, but creates more for others you leave behind. This being said, I don't believe those who contemplate and commit suicide are doing so selfishly.

When you stop and think about it with clarity of thought and comletely within your right mind, it seems selfish and even stupid, but there's the problem. People contemplating suicide usually aren't in their right mind, and their thoughts aren't clear. They're usualy severely depressed and are in an abnormal mental state. I don't say this from an outside mechanical view by any means, I used to have issues with depression, and at one point was contemplating suicide. At the time, its effect on those around was about the last thing on my mind, and the thought process that lead me to the conclusion that suicide was the answer, in retrospect seems completely idiotic to me. At the time it made perfect sense and didn't seem selfish at all. I can only assume it's the same for others in the situation.

When you look at these people from an outside view, you may see selfishness and stupidity, but if you look at it from their perspective, it makes sense. They're not trying to be selfish, they're not trying to push their problems onto everyone else. They're not thinking normally, and should be offered help.

[Yoko]

It is selfish in most cases (occasionally someone may have reasons that make it otherwise, but those cases are few and far between). It leaves your problems behind for others to deal with, and it leaves others to mourn for your death. It relieves you of pain, but creates more for others you leave behind. This being said, I don't believe those who contemplate and commit suicide are doing so selfishly.

When you stop and think about it with clarity of thought and comletely within your right mind, it seems selfish and even stupid, but there's the problem. People contemplating suicide usually aren't in their right mind, and their thoughts aren't clear. They're usualy severely depressed and are in an abnormal mental state. I don't say this from an outside mechanical view by any means, I used to have issues with depression, and at one point was contemplating suicide. At the time, its effect on those around was about the last thing on my mind, and the thought process that lead me to the conclusion that suicide was the answer, in retrospect seems completely idiotic to me. At the time it made perfect sense and didn't seem selfish at all. I can only assume it's the same for others in the situation.

When you look at these people from an outside view, you may see selfishness and stupidity, but if you look at it from their perspective, it makes sense. They're not trying to be selfish, they're not trying to push their problems onto everyone else. They're not thinking normally, and should be offered help.

I can agree with this to a full extent. You are right on all counts.

In addition to this, there is a huge difference between those who actually commit suicide and those who just have thoughts. If you can catch these signs early, you might be able to bring the person back. These thoughts can grow and manifest if you don't. It's like a progressive disease (for lack of a better explanation). As the depression worsens, so does ones willingness to live. If they're going through this alone, chances are, their mind will tell them it's the right thing to do. Meanwhile, from the perspective from those looking in who would do anything to help could see it as being selfish for a, not seeing what they are doing to themselves; and b, not seeing that there really are people who care about them.

[Judge Magistrate]

I thinkl the people who actually commit suicide are selfish the ones who only have thoughts still have a chance to be saved. I've lost two friends because they wouldn't let anyone know about their problem to help them. I have been able to help one of my friends because I learned of his suicide plans and thus was able to stop him. Now he doesn't have that problem anymore.

I don't think any less of anyone who had thoughts of suicide, it's those that actually follow through with it that I look down on. They just don't seem to realize what an impact it will have on those that knew them or their own families.

[Heartless Angel]

Can't speak for anyone else, but when I was having issues, I kept them to myself. At the time, asking for help, whining and asking for somebody to hold my hand, wasting everyone else's time helping me with my stupidity, THAT seemed selfish. Suicide seemed like a way to handle things without involving others. In retrospect, that line of reasoning is clearly illogical, but again, when you're in that situation, your thoughts are far from rational to begin with, and it's not at all difficult to see where some may reach the same conclusion I did at the time. It's not that they don't care that they're hurting other people, but that they don't even realize it. To me it seemed like the route that would affect those around me the least. Looking at it now with a less screwed up thought process, I of course come to another conclusion entirely.

[Assassin]

Thank you all for these great replies and m really thinking hard about this and R.Kyra m sorry but i don't think i'll be closing this thread bcoz i need some more replies n i wanna see what others think but if this thread bothers or annoys you tooo much then do tell me

[Yoko]

Belle, I said that in fear of things getting out of hand. Since that hasn't been the case, there's no need to apologize. This conversation is actually going quite nicely. What else might you be looking for?

Can't speak for anyone else, but when I was having issues, I kept them to myself. At the time, asking for help, whining and asking for somebody to hold my hand, wasting everyone else's time helping me with my stupidity, THAT seemed selfish. Suicide seemed like a way to handle things without involving others. In retrospect, that line of reasoning is clearly illogical, but again, when you're in that situation, your thoughts are far from rational to begin with, and it's not at all difficult to see where some may reach the same conclusion I did at the time. It's not that they don't care that they're hurting other people, but that they don't even realize it. To me it seemed like the route that would affect those around me the least. Looking at it now with a less screwed up thought process, I of course come to another conclusion entirely.

You might not be able to speak for others, but I can definitely speak for myself. I was the exact same way. Asking for help was probably the last thing on my mind. Dragging other people into my mess wasn't one of the things I wanted to do. It all comes with the messed up mental state. Looking back now I definitely see where I went wrong. And I sure as hell am glad I was able to get out of it.

I also hope that when others see this, they really do ask for help. Help can do wonders. You just need to ask.

[nickness89]

Stupidity is another thing that comes to mind. If by stupid you mean: not all there, you might actually be correct. By definition, one of it's meanings are 'Tending to make poor decisions or careless mistakes.' I made many many mistakes and made many many poor decisions. I did NOT have lack of intelligence during this time, which also falls under the definition of stupidity. I was fully aware of what was going on. The pain I was going through affected my mental state in a very bad way.

I meant it as in poor decision making and careless mistakes, I honestly don't think anyone is genuinely stupid as in "lack of intelligence" ... I just think some people don't sometimes know how to put their intelligence to use.

Like I said, and agree on with both R.Kyra and Heartless, it is a selfish act, it's just not intended to be selfish by the suicidal party. But then, you could say that the outsiders who call it suicidal, are saying so because they are pissed off that they have heaps to deal with afterwards, are annoyed that they now have a burden to bear with someone's death? Trying to be more psychological about it rather than just say "it's selfish/not selfish"

[Tiffany]

Definitely selfish. But it isn't done to be intentionally selfish, if that makes sense. People feel that there's no way out, that this is "it", they can't do this anymore... etc. More often than not its them thinking they're doing everyone else a favour, convoluted as THAT sounds.

We lost my fiancé's dad this way, **** did that ever suck. He honestly thought he was doing us all a favour by eradicating his life on here. Like my freaking god!!! We were better off with him here, dammit!!! But now we're getting married next weekend and he's not going to be there. He's not going to see his granddaughter grow up... so much stuff he's not here for because he chose a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

There's definitely something wrong in the brain with stuff like that. Healthy minds fight to live, its in our nature. Its how we can overcome things against all odds because its instinct to try and survive. If we didn't have that spark in us we'd have been extinct long ago. When your mind gives up and wants to die... that's something different. Help is needed, but as mentioned before most don't get it.

Its horribly sad.

[Rowan]

Its one of those things that can be looked at in different perspectives making it have no real answer. Could also be situational.
For example;

"NO! how could he do that to himself? and leave us with all his debt"

Selfish suicide.

"NO! how could he just leave us to deal with this grief"

Now whos being selfish?

Generally speaking, if someone doesnt want to live anymore they should have every right to die. The day you dont have the right to kill yourself is the day someone else is in control of your life. Thats not right.

Of course, I dont condone people to commit suicide since I think theres a solution to their problems and much joy to be had out of life, but at the same time If someone kills themselves because they cant deal with the pain of losing another or etc, I will not call them selfish.

[Diyala]

I think it is not more than a self harm , I can't call him /her selfish but pathetic and ignorant cause nothing is more criminal than taking ones life even if it is yours . And as being Muslim I believe eventhough he/she does that awful thing , it won't be the end of the pain anyway coz after death there would be the afterlife ! hell or heaven ? did that person do good when ending his life without having the right to do so?
I'm not the Lord and I can't say where he would be , but all I believe in is that it is entirely something wrong we should never do .I know life sometimes can be hard but we should have more faith that things will change in a good way and we will be able to go on.

[Furore]

I cannot consider it anything but selfish unless you lump self sacrifice in with suicide. A good number of people have been there at some point for any number of reasons, but you show some regard for those who care about you and you realise it would effect them terribly, worse then dying of most other causes.

And this is coming from someone who's known depression quite well, has random stages of feeling sick of how monotonous life seems on occasion and who is actually excited for death as it's a step into the unknown.