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Thread: Dude, where's my evil?

  1. #1
    Like a Boss Sean's Avatar
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    Dude, where's my evil?

    Seriously.

    Where's the evil, people! I don't mean pillaging, raping, burning. I mean world domination planning. We need to step up to the big time.

    I think it's time we overthrow the root beer industry. Who's with me?



    What a pathetic attempt at a thread. I r suck.

  2. #2
    Lady Succubus Victoria's Avatar
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    I thought Root Beer was bad for you? =P

  3. #3
    Hanna Barbarian True Omega's Avatar
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    I think we should conquer Subway, cut even more fat out of their sandwiches, but replace it with mind control drugs, then we take the world!
    This user is running Jason version T.0. and is subject to frequent freezeups, illegal operations, and dissapearing off the face of the planet at any time.

    And by all means, drama with bad taste.

  4. #4
    Mr. Person Taco-Calamitous's Avatar
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    Taking over fast food joints, and the like, eh? Although Root Beer is one of the healthier sodas, if I know my facts.

    I think we should take over Red Robin. Or just one Red Robin in general. Make their cooks our slaves, and then find out where they get their ingredients, so we can conquer whoever provides that service for them, as well.

    ...I like Red Robin. Anyways...

    Wuv, Yer Mom

  5. #5
    don't put your foot in there guy SOLDIER #819's Avatar
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    I recommend we aim to take over the McDonald's chain. Not so much for the food, what with the incomparable sealed evil that lies within its elementary school cafeteria-esque chicken sandwiches, but moreso because of its convenient locations. From there, we will erect oil towers and mine liquid cheese that is known to be stored in the molemen's lair below.

    We will then heat it to a boil, and with the oil towers create makeshift cheese cannons. Being as evil as we are, we will show no mercy. We will fire the liquid cheese directly at the moon. The condensed fatty cheesy mass will weigh the moon down and send it hurtling towards the Earth. Of course, there will be a hole in our plan, every supervillain has a hole.

    BUT IN EVERY HOLE THERE ARE THORNED PUSHES THAT PRICK THOSE WHO COME CLOSE! In order to find a solution to cheesy moon death, they will be forced to play Majora's Mask 20 times over and study the surprisingly accurate moon physics. With every mask they collect, with every groaning Goron they must endure, with every Zora solo they must play, their sanity will slowly but surely crack then snap. So even when they find their precious solution, all the world's leaders and scientists will be left as bumbling rabbits with crochet mallets, driven to the brink by Nintendophilism. We will then rejoice with Nacho cheese.

    Or we can take over Starbucks and pour heated mocha-coffee-stuff on everyone.
    Quote Originally Posted by Andromeda
    just turn off your PS3 or 360 go to your dust tomb and say you'll give birth to 1500 people a day for the 1000 that'll be killed until the doors to hades open and you can pull out ar tonelico and turn on that glorous PS2 and be bathed in its radiant warm glow

  6. #6
    BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU Archis's Avatar
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    I think that if we were going to plan world domination we have to do it right and I don't think we need anymore than 50 trustworthy people to do this.

    All you really need is a bunch of well-written peace treaties, a long-range assassination expert and a world leader, but it can't be the one from the USofA because of the hold we have in the world. We are the ones that have to be blamed for the assassination... We have to be the terrorists for it to work. It really wouldn't be that hard... Just some sly words and some nyuk nyuk nyuk and the world is yours.
    No.

  7. #7
    Mr. Person Taco-Calamitous's Avatar
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    Hmm... I like S's idea of destroying the planet by bringing the moon crashing down on it. Archis, your idea is well-defined and nice, too, but destroying everything would feel more satisfactory. I dunno. I'm just in a Kefka-ish mood today.

    I think it might be better if we arranged for somewhere to be when the moon came crashing down on the planet, other than the planet itself, however. What was the name of that asteroid thing that Magneto had in X-Men? We should commandeer that from him. Or just create a floating thingy of our own. Maybe enslave some brilliant scientists, or something, and then brainwash some people into running the oil towers for us while we escape into the far reaches of the universe.

    Then, we could come back a few years later, and build the Earth from scratch. Using slaves that we brought along on the voyage through space, of course. On Starship Elbanzo Brigade G. Or some other acronym for the EBG. They could even be slaves we found on another planet. Maybe cat people. Or lizard people. No, we'd befriend the lizard people, because they're inherently evil, anyway (and then double cross them later). The ones we'd enslave would be the rabbit people. And we'd stay far away from planet Grebalia, home of the giant guinea pigs. Those BASTARDS. (Maybe we could send Archis's long range assassin down there, have him kill their emperor, and watch chaos ensue from afar...)

    Anyway, I'm done ranting.

    Wuv, Yer Mom.

  8. #8
    Rinoa.Heartilly's Avatar
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    Fast food chains? nah. Take over the supermarkets...and the pet stores. Drug the food and have everybody follow you. You'll have an army of slaves at your diposal. Or itake over the military is several of the best countries. Disguise yourself as Bush(George W), take over Congress(through any meens necesisary) and spread the law that Jeb Bush spread(you know the one when you can use deadly force against deadly force) and have everybody in the United States shoot each other. And use the Nukes to blow up all who do not join.

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