(Misty scene to indicate atmosphere.) I was sitting in the DMV waiting for my number to be called, when an old guy sits next to me and he starts asking questions like: "So, you got kids? So, you married? So, you got a boyfriend?"
I thought he was just a kind old man just trying to make conversation, so I answered his questions (no to all of those) it was at this point that he got this creepy grin on his face and I realized with horror what he'd been getting at. I just sat there, mutely mouthing in shock as he giggled hideously. "It's valentines day, you know" he breathed in my ear. The old fart then forced me to take his number and then he wouldn't leave until I promised I'd call him. Which I really don't wanna do. Ugh...