Hey it's February

[Spooniest]

Have some soybeans.

LOni wa soto! Fuku wa uchi!7

[nix]

And you wonder why everybody thinks you're just an annoying twat

[Pete]

Maybe this is all some true detective shit, where we have to follow the clues and maybe uncover a murder or conspiracy,. A murderspiracy, if you will.

[Rowan]

Okay,

soybeans. Soiboi. Male Feminsts. Rebellion against patriarchy> Implying patriarchy exists.

Shit i hit a brick wall.
Gonna have to start at the start.

Soybeans. Soiboi... Shit.

[Pete]

I googled that gibberish, and it's a Japanese soybean festival. They celebrate roasted soybeans or some such crap.

I'm guessing this is a hint that someone, perhaps a vegan was set on fire at the time of this festival

[Rowan]

I'm guessing this is a hint that someone, perhaps a vegan was set on fire at the time of this festival

I knew I smelled shit.

[Pete]

The Soyboy Killer.

What if Spooniest is actually a moniker referring to the spoons heroin junkies use? As in, he's a major dealer, who may or may not get whacked out on his own supply. What if these soy people are promoting a healthy lifestyle, encouraging people to get off the dope? They'd have to be put down, naturally.

I think it's all becoming pretty clear.

[Spooniest]

Just getting my backsies at all the Oni. (Trolls).

That's how you deal with Trolls in Japan, during their something something festival in February. Look up Oni on wikipedia stupid.

By the way, Spoony = stupid and lovelorn.

When I first heard it, I thought it meant 'lowlife, of dubious character, con artist.' I'd never heard that one.

Then I looked it up. "Someone who is obsessed with romance, basically." So you mean me, Johnny Norris JR.?

Yeah that's me.

[Pete]

I still think you're good for a couple of hippie vegan murders

[Spooniest]

Crows are easy to shoot down, ya know.

And Tigers break their legs when they jump.

But Dragons have breath of fire. We'll burn ya.

~ Dirt Dragon.

[Pete]

Buddy, if this thing is talking to you, it might be time to stop huffing the cleaning products.

[Spooniest]

...And start using some?

Look, I don't know you from Adam. But if you're gonna play the jukebox, put A-11 the fuck on, I'm over it.

[Clint]

Soy contains estrogen and makes men grow tits.

[Polk]

[Spooniest]

Since when can you write a song, asstard.