Before you decide in favor of Texas seceding from the Union, you have to ask yourself this question; where would we get all our steers and queers from, then? And what about their salsas and spaghetti sauces? Without those, we'd be stuck with the inferior New York City brands ("NEW YORK CITY?!!")

No, Texas must remain a part of the union, I say. Anyhoo...


Wuv, Yer Mom