I moved it to the right forum, you were looking for the Final Fantasy Online forum, which is for discussions on both FFXI and FFXIV, the two online games.
Judging from your post, you're playing on PC. What you're describing sounds more like a PC issue rather than a network issue. Just to be sure, can you list the relevant parts of your PC's specs, processor, RAM, video card. That'll help to know if the PC is an issue.
I assume you're on the screen that says, "Start", "Data Center", "Opening Movie" (optional if you've watched it), "Configuration" and "Exit" right? If you are there and having trouble getting I'll try to step through things with you. You'll want to select a Data Center for sure, though it'll prompt you to pick one. If you're planning to play on Ultros, then yeah that's going to be a NA server. Though it shouldn't be causing issues on the menu screen. If you press the zero key on the num pad part of your keyboard a couple times, it'll select "Start" and put into the character select screen. If you haven't seen the "Opening Movie" yet, that'll play first and then you'll get to make your character. If you have seen it, then you just select your character and head in. Pressing the zero key again on the num pad will get you into game.
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