Part 2:

Like Meier, I keep my hair short to conceal the gray... because I'm 25 and sometimes life gives you shit, and buzzing it down makes it shit salad, or lemonade... I'm mixing metaphors here.

I quote the Simpsons all the time, often obscurely.

I'm a big fan of the number 13. It's been my number in baseball/ softball for years now

I also have a bat called Ultimate Weapon... and yes, it's legit