I am new around here, so I just read the first of this story last night. The story seems very promising so far. I was only able to finish chapter 2, I might have to print it out as I don’t do very well reading from a screen for long periods of time.

I did notice some sentences that are worded weird and are sometimes confusing. That can easily be missed while writing on your own. You may already have this, but does anyone read through your material before you post? That said what I am reading is over 2 years old so you may have made many changes by now ><