This is a sanctuary where we claim to be evil discuss any and all evil things, right?

(*crickets*)
Right.

So I've been thinking about some things lately. Namely my childhood---all the good times and the bad times. The times where I look back and say, "What the hell was I thinking?! Buying E.T. for the Atari 2600 with my hard-earned allowance money has to be the biggest mistake of my life thus far! What the ****? KOOL-AID MAN HAD AN ATARI GAME?! When did I buy THIS shit?"

(True story.)

Then I realized something.

I was annoyed in my childhood. Not just I-slipped-on-banana annoyed, but bloody annoyed by two different animated characters across two different forms of entertainment. Two unstoppable, unkillable forces from their respective genres; two villains whose annoyance perhaps knows no equal.

*

*

*

In a world where you could punch cartoony canines...

One says nothing. One doesn't shut up.
One flaunts your failures. One fixes failures.
One hides in chest-high grass. One hides in hilariously-to-scale pottery.
It all leads to this one simple question:


Which canine caricature is the most contemptible?


Duck Hunt Dog

V.S.


Scrappy Doo