Djinn is dead to me. We used to be like brothers and shit, but ever since we were both on the Jerry Springer show after I had an affair with his goat, Tiffany Baxter Rodgers, he's been really cold and distant to me.

I miss the old days when we used to go waterskiing and eating entire buckets of KFC and shit but I will always have the memories. I guess I just needed a way to get this out as it has me feeling really depressed and shit. So depressed I feel like becoming a Jehovah's Witness just so everyone else will be as depressed as me in my presence.

I think I need to go cry somewhere...