Regrets

[Cyanist]

During the course of one's lifetime he or she will have passed up a gazzilion great opportunities, or they shall fail in another way, such as accidentally putting their hand-knit-socked foot in a stray pat of butta left by floor-residing toast eaters *respectful heartfelt pause*

That brings us to my question: If you could go back in time to any point in your life and tell or warn your younger self of something, what would it be?

Your honest answers here, please

[Xanatos]

I believe we had a similar thread not too long ago. Since I can't think of anything remotely serious right now my answer remains the same... I would go back in time, yell surprise mother****er, and kick my old self while Dragon Age II is still installing, I would give him/me some extra beating just in case, no one deserves to experience such a disappointment (yup, I still can't get over it).

[Cyanist]

Wow, you did this before? Well I doubt you employed the use of the snazzy poll options and of course my particular brand of pizazz (thank you SuperSabin)...

I think I'd tell myself at 9 years old to stop being such an adorable snooty little attention hog - but I think I'm still doing that

Seriously I'd tell her not to sweat the small stuff and enjoy life while it's still good, because it's going to get much harder.
And then she will reply "Bring it, ya old bag, I'll taking it all on!"

[che]

I could always go back and tell myself something. How many trips do I get? Not that I don't embrace who I am today because of my choices, or enjoy my life a little less. I guess I'd start earliest as possible, and then work into my teens and twenties. But isn't that what being a parent is? I could use my life experiences to teach my kid. So boom sucka, I pretty much win this thread.

edit: added some arrogance at the end of my post for flair.

[Cyanist]

And it is very stylish, Che. You make a good point if you're planning to have children, but in the past, aren't you, too, a child? So just use that parenting advice on your past self - you can pretend that younger you is your son (who, strangely looks like you did, is growing up in the same place and is making the exact same mistakes) if you like, you go right ahead!
Oh, and you can have as many trips as you like

[che]

And it is very stylish, Che. You make a good point if you're planning to have children, but in the past, aren't you, too, a child? So just use that parenting advice on your past self - you can pretend that younger you is your son (who, strangely looks like you did, is growing up in the same place and is making the exact same mistakes) if you like, you go right ahead!
Oh, and you can have as many trips as you like

I'm gonna be making a lot of trips in this scenario, then! While I do like the fact that I'm allowed (in this case) to go back and give myself advice, thus making myself more informed than I am today (when my past selves reach that age [speaking of, are we talking multiple pasts? or just one?])

Okay, now I'm confused as shit. I can use my mistakes to try to be a better father for my children. Orrrrrrr I could go in the past and give myself advice, (thus affecting my current self?) so that I have even more to teach my children. But what if informing my past self means that I know more, but I can't call on mistakes I've made as examples to teach or inform my children because I didn't make as many because I got better advice.

If something happened to my children because I went back to try to fix something, then I'd really regret it. So I'm leaning on taking my chances with how I am now.

Hmm...

[Michael Swayne]

Okay, you can have multiple chances to go back to your past self. But if you go to the earliest one, you may either increase or decrease the number of chances needed to basically instruct yourself on what to do. Let's say one thing a person wants to change is that one time in Kindergarten when they ate paste during arts and crafts. That paste-eating event could actually be the root of all the bad decisions the person made in their life. If they tell past-self to not eat paste, then past-self could then make good decisions in life; therefore making that self the present self. Then present-self would see this thread, see that they wouldn't need the chance to go back in time, and therefore make a post saying that they wouldn't need to go back in time because they made all the right choices in life.

It makes a lot more sense in my head than it does reading it. I hope you were able to understand the logic behind it. As for me, there is one instance in my life where I would go back. I think (I'm still not sure I would want to or not) I would want to go back to a few years ago and tell past-self to not take care of my parents' house while they were away. I would say to past-self to just move on and live my own life, instead of trying to be the dutiful son. It sure hasn't turned out the way I wanted it to.

Or maybe the one time I decided to not eat paste in Kindergarten. Maybe if I had ate paste, my life would be different than what it is now.

[Rhaps]

My first trip I'd go back and make sure I did all of my homework, because stupid decisions get made by indecision, so I think if I went back in time and socked myself every time past me missed an assignment, it'd be all good, and I wouldn't be stressing about college.

As a more frivolous yet esteeming trip back in time, I'd break up with the girl I dated for two years to avoid the heartbreak she was gonna bring me, and get with the girl who works with me currently but no longer digs me since I lost my chance by ignoring her for a year at the sake of keeping the present girl. It's a dumb situation, and I'm honestly not sure if I'd be any happier or wiser if things changed, but hey, it's my hypothetical timeline, so whatever.

[loaf]

Since I'm only 23, I wont vote on this poll. I will vote when I am at least of the age of 60. If I don't make it that far then the most regretful must be that set of years of died in. BBL in 40yrs.

[Heartless Angel]

I'd sit myself down and teach myself a bit about formal logic theory as soon as I was old enough to even remotely grasp it. Which in my case is actually probably pretty young. I wasted so much of my childhood being stupid. I easily had the intelligence to skip two or three grades, I just didn't.

At least that's what I'd like to think I'd do, but I'm STILL too busy ****ing around to get serious and do anything with my life. If I actually had a time machine to go tell myself something, I'd probably use the opportunity to troll myself. Like I'd go back, explain who I was, start an extremely vague sentence with something that sounded like a warning, then act like my time machine was ****ing up mid warning, and disappear, leaving my poor younger self to try and figure out what I was trying to tell him. Not even I am safe from my trolling.

[Lacquer Head]

I wouldn't do it. Every mistake is a lesson learned, and without said lessons learned, you will just be destined to make the same mistakes. I'm happy and proud of the mistakes I've made, I try to use each one as a new lesson. Looking to the past is just pointless anyway, only look towards the future, think about what changes you can make now and later.

[Leon]

Probably not. During my recent break up I always wanted to think what it would be like to travel back in time and try to make it better, especially since it was me who called it off. But then I thought something worse could happen if I changed something. And yes, I'm aware of the Butterfly Effect.

[Tiffany]

I was going to post something similar to what LH posted. You can't change the past, only the future... so there's no point in wasting time in regrets. The only time mistakes are not a great thing to me is when you don't learn from them and keep repeating them. Not to mention, I'm very happy with how my life is right now. If I went back and tried to change something I could change where I am now and that's not desirable for me.

I've made some pretty wicked mistakes in my life growing up, but they've led me to where I am now.


Its easy IMO to say these things mind you, but harder to try and put them into action. I'm human and I do regret things, bad choices etc. But I needed to make those mistakes to learn and grow and be who/where I am today.


ETA - Interesting if you could go back of course. I wouldn't change anything either. I'd probably become OCD about it and each time if something didn't happen the way I wanted it to, I'd go back and try a different way, then again and again. At what point would you stop trying to change your past if you had infinite means to do so and start living for your future?

Also - I didn't vote on the poll.

[Tallulah]

I only have two regrets in my life: first not doing something else at university. I originally signed up to do Journalism, and absolutely hated it. For one thing, nothing goes on in the podunk little town where I was studying, the lecturers were very politically biased (to the left; so am I, but I don't think this gave a good impression of the course or the subject), and I just didn't gel with my colleagues, who were mostly spoilt little rich kids or clueless idiots (some were both!) It didn't help that the department was quite new, that halfway through my second year, they told me I could have changed courses within the first six weeks (by then it was way too late) and the death of my grandfather in the first term of my third year made me say, '**** it!' And for my efforts, I am saddled with £16,000 of debt. I wish I hadn't bothered, quite frankly...

The other one, the biggest, is staying with my ex, Paul, for as long as I did. I was with the dweeb for a little under three years, and my parents were the first to see it, about two and a half years into the 'relationship' (I use the term loosely!) He was rude, presumptuous, snivelling and vile to my folks, and I was just too blind to see it. My dad was so enraged by him during the visit, he felt he couldn't stay in his own house.

Looking back, this little **** was possessive, and wrecked a few of my friendships (one of them, a work colleague, hated him so much she actually blocked me and only re-added me when I eventually broke up with this fool), demeaned everything I did (I did this taking calls for charity thing when I worked in a call-centre, and when he came to collect me he demeaned my efforts saying 'it's all going to the poxy government anyway', just another of his frequent anti-anything tirades in his whiny, nasally, stinking faux-Cockney voice; he was actually from North London), and p***ing and moaning when I was one minute late from leaving work (I actually relish doing overtime now because I was denied the opportunity for so long).

Furthermore, as well as as being incredibly childish, babyish and naïve (he used such childish terms for practically everything such as calling my banana bread 'ninny bread' - makes me sick just thinking on it!), he would think that a hug and a kiss solved everything. I actually punched him one in the face one time because he wound me up so much. The worst thing is - well, I'm a little clumsy at work, and got (and still get!) a lot of bruises on my arms. My mum saw these and thought this pathetic little **** had been hitting me. I assured her he wasn't, and that I had a better chance against him, but I don't think she believed me. It was a day of rejoicing for her (and my dad, especially) when I kicked him out.

Kev, my friend at work, reckoned he saw my ex a couple weeks ago; apparently he looks 'a right state' and his hair is all long and greasy. Last I had heard he was in a happy relationship, engaged to a seventeen year old girl (the age of consent in Britain is 16 so it's not so bad, but still... ew!) Though a couple of months ago, my friend Hannah who used to work with me, said she had seen him around (by himself, so I suppose with Kev's evidence as well, the seventeen-year-old has made her escape), as she and her fiance are unfortunate enough to live round the corner from him. I hate him, have no desire to ever see him again, and, as he use to say to a lot of people (behind the backs of strangers, mainly...) 'bad luck and ill health to him!'

Sorry for the essay, guys, but I find it cathartic answering such questions. Besides, ya did ask!

[Rowan]

I regret that I didnt furthar study subjects like psychology, world culture, science, politics and sociology. At the time, i wasn't interested in anything except hanging out with friends (which is what almost every teenager likes to do, I imagine) and its only now that I wish I could study these subjects, but due to lack of funds and that im in full time work, I can only read books and educate myself. I think that I could gain just as good an understanding from reading and educating myself than a classroom (maybe not as efficient, but an understanding nevertheless) but hate that I could never be qualified to use any of the knowledge I gain in a job unless I have some sort of qualification from an institude that says "we agree that he understands it at a satisfactory level".

I know im still young... what would you do?

[Cyanist]

I'm gonna be making a lot of trips in this scenario, then! While I do like the fact that I'm allowed (in this case) to go back and give myself advice, thus making myself more informed than I am today (when my past selves reach that age [speaking of, are we talking multiple pasts? or just one?])

Wow, you really like to knit-pick, man! I got no prob withit tho, I enjoy details.
Let us hypothetically assume your younger you is not altogether you, but is an exact replica of you. NOW, for an unspecified reason you wish for this other person to avoid mistakes and choose the better path that will lead to the ultimately useful life available and possible. I get that maybe some bad stuff led to other bad stuff (like if I grabbed a cookie from my friend's house without asking and then found it tasted better than honest cookies and then I became a kleptomaniac) but if it's not directly related, I think that would take a separate trip, wouldn't you?

Okay, now I'm confused as shit. I can use my mistakes to try to be a better father for my children. Orrrrrrr I could go in the past and give myself advice, (thus affecting my current self?) so that I have even more to teach my children. But what if informing my past self means that I know more, but I can't call on mistakes I've made as examples to teach or inform my children because I didn't make as many because I got better advice.

If something happened to my children because I went back to try to fix something, then I'd really regret it. So I'm leaning on taking my chances with how I am now.

Hmm...

You may do as you wish, of course. Go ahead, dear papa. And I am sure any child will listen to your woeful adventures with eager ears. Good luck. You're still welcome to share if you change your mind.

I was going to post something similar to what LH posted. You can't change the past, only the future... so there's no point in wasting time in regrets. The only time mistakes are not a great thing to me is when you don't learn from them and keep repeating them. Not to mention, I'm very happy with how my life is right now. If I went back and tried to change something I could change where I am now and that's not desirable for me.

I've made some pretty wicked mistakes in my life growing up, but they've led me to where I am now.


Its easy IMO to say these things mind you, but harder to try and put them into action. I'm human and I do regret things, bad choices etc. But I needed to make those mistakes to learn and grow and be who/where I am today.

Okay, um maybe this has gotten out of bounds a bit (though it has been fun ) you say mistakes make people who they are? I find that true and if you're afraid that sharing those mistakes would somehow steal your sole, okay then, you may be excused.

ETA - Interesting if you could go back of course. I wouldn't change anything either. I'd probably become OCD about it and each time if something didn't happen the way I wanted it to, I'd go back and try a different way, then again and again. At what point would you stop trying to change your past if you had infinite means to do so and start living for your future?

Also - I didn't vote on the poll.

I suppose nobody could just answer the question, hmm? we all have to throw in some obstacles to tongue-tie the slow-witted Cyan, hmm? But will I get tired of putting up with it? Never.

Well, yeah. We could all go live the rest of our lives right now as a matter of fact! Kick in our com screens and fling our mice aside, burst from our houses and take flight! And nestle safely into the arms of our futures! Riiiiiight after I finish this pro-life post.

P.S. How dare you not vote on my poll. How am I supposed to gather random info for the aliens if people won't provide input?