The Final Fantasy Vending Machine

[darkViVi]

You get a door.

*inserts a drunk I found laying on the street*

[Tiger Lily]

You get the shredded and bloody remains of the drunk.

*Inserts coin*

[Bleachfangirl]

You get an original version of FFVIII with a strategy guide!

*inserts 2 coins*

[Riddler]

You get a dead and raped Squall!

*Inserts 10 cats*

[Lunasa]

You recieve 10 Agility Tokens.

You attempt to use one!

THHHHH.......They're FAKE!

*Inserts Agility Token*

[Riddler]

You recieved a naked Hojo!

*Puts Ultimecia in*

[Meier Link]

you get a cross dressing cloud action figure

::inserts TP::

[Riddler]

You get a stunned Tifa

:Inserts Valefor:

[Meier Link]

you get a yuffies head on a pike!

::inserts car keys::

[Momo Mastermind]

The machine vibrates for a moment and stops...

smoke fizzles from the "insert" slot...

then a drunken, stunned, disoriented, naked Cloud is shot from the "vending" slot.

-inserts $1,000,000-

[Meier Link]

wow you got a pile of books from the shinra mansions basement lab! go u!

::inserts momo's toilet from his sig!::

[Momo Mastermind]

After taking a ridiculously long time shoving the entire toilet into the vending machine [somehow] you get a chunk of Rinoa's hair [with some of the scalp still attached].

-Inserts some sarcasm-

[Meier Link]

seeing that wouldnt take much effort coming from you, you receive a 1/100000 size replica of clouds shoulder pad

::inserts 1 gil::

[Momo Mastermind]

YES! Contact-lense sized armor! lolz.

You receive Barrett's Limit Break, Catastrophe!!!

-inserts a nun-

[Meier Link]

you receive a 16OZ sample bottle of the life stream in its purest form!

::inserts a severed chocobo head::

[Momo Mastermind]

The nun that was shoved through the slot just moments before comes tumbling out with tears running down her face; she grabs your arm and with a smile says "God is in that machine..." then she crawls back inside.

You notice a small token on the ground where she just was; in golden letters it says "the ultimate prize awaits he who inserts this coin"

-picks the coin up and inserts it-

[Meier Link]

you receive a piece of paper that says the same thing on both sides. "to receive the ultimant prize flip to the other side"

::inserts buster sword::

[Riddler]

After taking a while to shove the buster sword in a red hair Cloud comes out looking very angry

-Inserts Hojo-

[Meier Link]

out pops a chest containing..... a MONSTER-IN-A-BOX!

::inserts ???? shoe::

[Riddler]

You get a masamune that stabs you in the face for putting ????'s shoe in the vending machine

-Inserts Meier Links wig-

[MoonStone]

you get nothing

"inserts the order"

[Riddler]

You get handcuffed

-Inserts Moonstone-

[FF Ace Cid]

Receives Emerald.

*Inserts coin*

[Riddler]

You receive a bottle of geostigma

*Inserts a drunken bum*

[Meier Link]

you get a limited edition final fantasy 13 eraser with matching toothbrush

inserts fingernail clippings

[loner-kid]

You receive. Oh no a monster! Battle transition

Inserts life force

[Riddler]

You receive a Lich which casts doom on you

*Inserts Easter Eggs*

[HUNK]

You recive Clouds Cell phone.

*inserts Soul Edge*

[FF Ace Cid]

You receive Sasuke Knife.

*Inserts Koga knife*

[Riddler]

You receive a cardboard dagger

*Inserts Cid's Lance/Spear*