The Final Fantasy Vending Machine

You get a nuke (can I have it?)

/insert Dark Materia

You get a sparkly Sephiroth Pulshi, and a quarter!

*Inserts White Materia*

You recieve a "HOLY chocobos you're back!" spell to to use the GF Alexander's "holy chocobos" attack with.

You get a coconut even though you didn't put on anything ;7

/put on 3 silver coins

Yeah... I didn't put anything in since I can manipulate machinery with my mid... I didn't forget dammit! ;!

Oh and you recieve Necron's spleen signed by Vivi.

*telepathically inserts 50p coin*

You get a piece of paper that says: Don't play WoW.

*Inserts pig*

My Warlok comes out of the machine and casts Hellfire, the entirer are burst into flames incinerating Tiger Lily

*puts in empty beer bottle*

You get shards of glass.

*Inserts coin*

You get your coin back along with a note; "no russian coins are accepted"

/insert beer cap

you get a beer

*inserts coin*

You get a one night stand.

*Inserts a condom*

You get a wench but now you have no condoms.

/chugs beer previously recieved from machine and inserts empty bottle

Receives a new beer, filled in with the same bottle, recycling is good.

*Inserts coin*

you get the same coin, but it now says "save a tree kill a bever"
(there's my crappy spelling for ya)
*inserts coin*

You get a beaver tooth...it's bloody.

*inserts beaver tail*

A PETA representative crawls out of the machine
*inserts a coin*

A magpie scarpers out the machine and steals the coin. In a distant, sqwarky voice squealing "shineeeeeeey!"

*inserts needle*

you get a blind moogle with needle-sized holes in his eyes

*inserts coin*

You recieve a porn mag with all the interesting bits scribbled out by black marker

*inserts coin*

a blue spartan shows up from his hiding place and snipes you out, while a red one says "you just got pwned, I saw it. Pwned"

*inserts coin*

You receive a note saying that you are to be in the next movie that is a parody of a Chuck Norris move.

*inserts Chuck Norris and a 6-pack of moonshine*

your moonshine turns into a bomb!!!!BYE BYE!

*inserts computer partners brain*

You get a camera.

*Inserts tonsils*

you recieved a tissue from ffvii

*puts coins in*

you get a blond wig

::puts in gil::

You get a dead Tidus

:.Puts a old lady in:

You get an old ladies smelly panties in your face.

*inserts beer bottle cap*

You get a funnel

*Inserts a beer bottle*

You get a beer, yay!

*inserts broken piece of glass*

You get a window

*inserts door knob*