women proposing to men?

[Rowan]

Why is it the man that proposes to the woman? I've always wondered this about this tradition and there is probably some history to it. I could always google this I suppose but in the interest of keeping the forums active, I thought I'd ask you all what you think. Theres a day where women are allowed to propose to men, I think that sucks. I'd hate to be proposed to and put on the spotlight, but i assume women like that kind of thing. So whats the deal?

[Yoko]

I'm indifferent I guess. Some women have more balls than men, others are completely bloody clueless to life and don't expect it. I suppose those who would take up the proposal burden are the ones with balls, but even that really depends. It depends on the relationship itself. Who is the 'planner' and who just goes for the ride? It's just 'expected' that the men have to propose to the woman. It is an interchangeable role though.

[Alpha]

My cousin (female) proposed, rather than the other way around. I don't see any problem with it. I think maybe the reason for the tradition is because one of the couple has to it eventually. If it weren't up to the male, it's possible there'd be an awkward limbo where each partner is waiting upon the other to propse.

So maybe it has no implications or meaning and is just a decision rule.

I wonder how gay couples manage it? I should ask my (other, gay) cousin how it went down.

[Yoko]

I wonder how gay couples manage it? I should ask my (other, gay) cousin how it went down.

With what I said in my post, this is basically what I'm referring to as well. I helped a friend propose to her (now) fiance. It's all about who is the 'planner'. Someone has to do it eventually as you said.

I wonder if it has to do with who is more financially stable and willing to buy the ring.

[Halie]

I'd rather be proposed to than propose to a guy, I have a hard time telling people how I feel so I imagine proposing would be a difficult thing for me to do even if I really wanted to marry the person I was with. Also, I think it's really chivalrous for a guy to do it. I have a lot of respect for women who do it though, I'd like to have that kind of confidence.

I don't think it has to do with is more dominant because I'm fairly dominant with my relationships with friends, etc. but I wouldn't want to propose.

[seanb]

If a woman proposed to me, I would probably feel like a little bitch. ...I think I would anyway,..

I reckon its a dominance thing, nature, animals do it too,.. the male lion shows what he can offer to a female, then she either accepts or the lion rapes her

its what were wired to do. So my bet is on instinct

[NikkiLinkle]

I'm a heterosexual woman, so for me it's soo romantic for a guy to propose. He's like, hey you I want to be your guy forever. I want you to be my girl forever because I love you. Awww.

I have no issue if it's the other way around. Depends on the relationship I guess and the people in it.

[Unknown Entity]

These days it's almost unheard of for a woman to pop the question because I think it's still expected of a man to. Marriage was once about establishing a family, and not always for love or pleasure. It joined two families of similar status together in order to preserve the wealth and family names of both families. A similar question is why women are usually the ones to change their surname after marriage, and why children almost always have their father's last name?

I think it's more acceptable for a woman to propose now as marriage isn't what it once was. Women have a much higher standing than we once had - we can have jobs, equal salaries, the right to vote, run for government, etc. Why shouldn't we be able to have the right to choose our partner? Two people aren't recognised as a couple by law unless they're married. Not everyone is religious and can/should be forced into a religious rite to be recognised as such. I think women have that right to make the move, regardless of beliefs, if they feel that their boyfriend/girlfriend is the one they want to share their life with.

[motscroises]

I think a woman proposing can be very romantic! I couldn't really picture the typical proposal with a ring on bended knee, but I bet it could very sweet and cute. I guess I'd just prefer a spontaneous marriage proposal anyways...I'd hate to be put on the spot. I picture it being a very intimate thing.

I don't really find a woman proposing to be emasculating to a man because marriage and relationships aren't necessarily about gender roles. The proposal is a declaration of their feelings and a desire for forever with this person...I don't see why a man would feel emasculated by a woman saying these things.

But some people find these gender roles really important in a relationship, so I guess it's just different for everyone.

[Freya]

Actually, I've discussed this with my boyfriend a while ago. I don't know why, we don't plan on marrying soon, but we still talked about it. Mostly due to the fact that I was the one who started the relationship by having the balls to ask him what he's feeling. Maybe because of that, it wouldn't be weird for me to propose to him.

But still, I'm way too conservative for such stuff. I want him to propose to me. And I wouldn't want to have to think of a great proposal. My sister's husband was really creative, even though he needed two tries because on one day my sister was ill.
But I, personally, wouldn't want to have to think of something as creative as he did. So I'll let my boyfriend handle things. xP

[Clint]

Women who propose to a man are most likely proposing to a gay man. If a man doesn't have the testicular fortitude to propose, then he's an overly-feminine coward, possibly possessing female hormones and a vagina, and two X chromosomes.

And a woman who proposes to a man is a goddamn feminist who believes in exact equality between the sexes, even if it means taking jobs away from men, even if the job was designed for the physical qualities of a man, such as a fireman, or a policeman, or a mailman. Women have to butt in and pretend that they're physically stronger then men, which explains why so many women have won the World's Strongest Man competition. It baffles me why the name of that competition hasn't been changed to "The World's Strongest Person."

Feminists are ruining the world by pissing off men and making them even more sexist.

[Niall_farley]

Women who propose to a man are most likely proposing to a gay man. If a man doesn't have the testicular fortitude to propose, then he's an overly-feminine coward, possibly possessing female hormones and a vagina, and two X chromosomes.

And a woman who proposes to a man is a goddamn feminist who believes in exact equality between the sexes, even if it means taking jobs away from men, even if the job was designed for the physical qualities of a man, such as a fireman, or a policeman, or a mailman. Women have to butt in and pretend that they're physically stronger then men, which explains why so many women have won the World's Strongest Man competition. It baffles me why the name of that competition hasn't been changed to "The World's Strongest Person."

Feminists are ruining the world by pissing off men and making them even more sexist.

They do cry for equal rights and to be treat the same yet if I went and punched a woman in the nose that wouldn't be right? Hmmmm

Also I told my girlfriend of she every proposes I'm going to say no! I will propose when I have the money to get married. I see little point in proposing to only be engaged for years I want to propose and get married within a year 6 months ideally but a year max I think it's very 'Chav' when people get engaged and don't get married for years! But that's personal and don't have anything against it but i just don't like the idea

[Lily]

A guy who I was seeing years back said his friends girlfriend propsed to him, and I couldnt help myself but think, gee, that's desperate. I couldn't bring myself to propose to a man ever. Id just rather not get married than ask myself.

Also, who is expected to buy the ring? Would she buy it ask him and like...present herlself with the ring she already bought...?

Traditioanlly, isnt it just that back in the day, the men were the providers and the daughters were essentially sold off with a dowry from daddy?

Theres a day where women are allowed to propose to men, I think that sucks

Leap year haha

[Crescent]

I would. But he'd have to be pretty fkng special. Cause I've never wanted to get married or God fobid.. have kids.

[IcyJJ]

I feel that if a woman wants to propose, why not? Some guys are shy and don't know what to do, so if the woman takes charge and does, more power to them.