Don't talk to strangers!

[alexiuspine]

Do you talk with strangers at all? Do you enjoy those brief random chats with people whom are just passing by? Perhaps you despise them(chitchat or strangers or both!) and avoid them as best you can? Have you any clever ways to politely avoid dreaded small talk? What's the best random conversation you've had with a stranger, if any?

[octoberpumpkin]

I'll talk to strangers sometimes but overall it makes me feel very awkward and uncomfortable

[Pete]

I'll talk to everyone. It's pretty bad actually because I can't help it. If someone asks me a question, it usually turns into a conversation that I can't easily back out of them without making it awkward.

I also tend to get into conversations with cabbies, since most of them in the city drive the same vehicle that I do.

On job sites, it has its ups and downs. If you talk to people, sometimes they hook you up with free crap like tshirts and hats, which are always useful. Other times, people think you're going to be their friend and let things slide when they really should be doing the right thing.

[Lily]

sometimes, though id rather not

[Sheechiibii]

I like talking to strangers but I usually don't start them because I can be shy. The way I see it strangers are just potential-friends you haven't met yet.

[OceanEyes28]

Haha. Waiting tables for a couple of years got me pretty good at navigating conversations with strangers. I do usually prefer to be left alone, unless I'm out somewhere it's likely I'll want to meet new friends (like a party or a bar). I'm fairly likeable aside from my resting bitch face. But on a subway or in a grocery line? Please don't look at me, thx.

[Heartless Angel]

Don't talk to strangers, 'cause they're only there to do you harm. Don't write in starlight, 'cause the words may come out real. Don't hide in doorways. You may find the key that opens up your soul. Don't go to heaven, 'cause it's really only hell. Don't smell the flowers. They're an evil drug to make you lose your mind. Don't dream of women, 'cause they only bring you down. Hey you, you know me, you've touched me, I'm real. I'm forever the one that lets you look and see and feel me. I'm danger - I'm the stranger. And I, I'm darkness, I'm anger, I'm pain. I am the master, the evil song you sing inside your brain. Drive you insane. Don't talk. Don't let them inside your mind, yeah! Run away, run away, go! No - no! Don't let them in your mind! Protect your soul! Don't dance in darkness, you may stumble and you're sure to fall. Don't write in starlight, 'cause the words may come out real. Don't talk to strangers, 'cause they're only there to make you sad. Don't dream of women, 'cause they'll only bring you down. Yeah! Run, run, run, run away!

Now that I have that out of my system... I hate small talk. Especially when it's people I don't know, who don't know me, and are not likely to at any time in the future. It's fine if it's the first day at a job or a class or something and you're going to have to deal with them again eventually. But when it's the douchebag next to you on the plane you're never going to see again? I don't give a **** how many cats you have or what sports team you like. By this time tomorrow I will have forgotten that you exist. I have more worthwhile things to be thinking about right now than your inane babbling.

The wise speak when they have something to say. A fool speaks when he has to say something. I have no patience for fools.

As for avoidance tactics, acting like a sociopathic douche usually works. And I find that particularly easy, because I am, in fact, a sociopathic douche.

[Crescent]

If by strangers you mean total sleazebags n creeps who dont take my aloofness, bitch face n lack of response for a "leave me alone" sign which is 99.9% of the time. Apart from the constant catcalling, on the odd occasion I catch public transport which I did last wknd I was meeting up with an old friend, these guys got on the bus n were trying to get my attention I gave in so they showed me their cars n asked me for my number n where I was headed to then told me to dump my friend and go with them.. disgusting much?! then just yesterday afternoon this guy on his bike stopped before me n asked if I wanted to do a fitness exercise with him..I'm sorry Excuse me?!

The only time I dont mind speaking to strangers is when their old ladies who just want a lil chat. It's always about how nice the weather is, late the bus is, just to tell me that im pretty ^///^ then they show me pictures of their grandchildren..it's nice. A one-off, about month ago I caught the bus I was sitting at the front n the bus was already pretty full so I was reading my DMC3 manga on my phone n this guy tapped me on the shoulder n asked me what I was 'reading'. I told him Devil May Cry then he was like "shit! I didnt know Devil May Cry had a manga!" then we just kinda talked about what games I liked n he mentioned he didnt kno bout the HD collection n how he nowadays plays only on PC. I was getting off soon n he tried to ask me for my number but it was too late I smiled n waved at him bye. Or when I take my baby for a walk, a lot of ppl stop n ask me what breed he is n if they can pat him ie. my baby's a Samoyed. I dont blame em, my dog's so fkng cute V^.^V esp in the Black n white Adidog hoodie I walked him in yesterday(raining), a lady asked me what breed of dog he was whilst on the phone then told the person on the other end how gorgeous my dog was hehe or the cashier asking me where I got my pants n top from then we somehow delved into the topics of travelling, friends getting engaged n how sick it makes us lol Small talk like that that makes me smile.. I dnt mind at all.

Have you any clever ways to politely avoid dreaded small talk?

Yes I have a few. One is very common -having my headphones in listening to music- yet most are still very persistent. I shouldnt have to think up ways for you to get a clue n stop harassing me. If I say no, Im not interested.

/rant

[Rowan]

When a guy calls you pretty he's a sleazebag but when its a little old lady, its sweet. Feminism strikes again...
KIDDING!
but seriously, you are from NSW sydney or something, right? People are violent there. Id never take public transport in that shithole. Public transport here is bad enough.

[Crescent]

I dont care if a guy calls me pretty, I say thankyou but then I want to be left alone after that.

Yeah it can get pretty seedy but its my home n I feel safe here than anywhere else in the world.

[Clint]

I don't talk to strangers out of fear of being raped. I don't know who is a rapist, because we don't typically brand criminals with insignias identifying their crimes, so I've gotten into the habit of assuming that everybody is a rapist, and rapists are people to avoid... Unless if you're a rapist yourself, because you can't exactly avoid yourself... Unless if you're constantly asleep. So if you're a rapist in a coma, then I guess you can avoid yourself.

[OceanEyes28]

If a male that I know calls me pretty, or even if a guy I've just been introduced to gives me a genuine compliment (and you can tell if it's genuine), then I don't mind, and it can be kinda nice (although I do prefer being told I'm smart or funny or interesting but okay).

If it's a complete stranger yelling it to me on the street, it's uncomfortable. If it's some dude expressing something he'd like to do to me (as opposed to with, as in with my consent), it's threatening. Because if he wanted to, he probably could. He could probably physically overpower me, and I don't know if he's the kind of person who will.

A little old lady is not going to overpower me and put her **** in me. I mean, I don't think. First time for everything, I guess.

I know you said jk and all, but I think jokes about feminism do more harm than you think they do.

[ezio69]

Shit What is it with you two? You both should just make your own group and out troll eachother

Yeah I do talk to strangers Im a pretty sociable guy. It's easier for me to talk to strangers because I probably won't see them again in my life lol so I'm just more comfortable n I say whatever.

Id say that attitude has gone down well with both ladies online and in rl. I mustve have done something right when I first joined here and talked with crescent since we now talk outside TFF too.

I didnt call you pretty though, but stunning yeahh

[Rowan]

Do you think that I hate women and think that they deserve to be raped? Do you think that I think men are better than women? And that women should just stay in the kitchen and not have a job? Well guess what, im not a fkn moron, but I am also not a feminist. Your constant generalisation of males is worse than my generalisation of feminism. We will never see eye to eye on this, sorry I brought it up.

[alexiuspine]

Please, Rowan and Gene Hackman, do not comment at all on my threads if you are instigating trouble.

[Clint]

A little old lady is not going to overpower me and put her **** in me.

If women had upper body strength, nobody would overpower anybody. If feminism is about equality, shouldn't women start lifting their body weight?

Also people generally know that rape is wrong. There is a very small percentage of rapists as opposed to non-rapists. Assuming that every man who talks to you wants to rape you is pure sexism.

Take me, for example. Whenever I talk to a lovely lady, I don't want to rape her. I just want to steal her purse.

Please, Rowan and Gene Hackman, do not comment at all on my threads if you are instigating trouble.

Can't take a joke?

[OceanEyes28]

Didn't know it was about to get #NotAllMen up in here.

No I don't think you guys are rapists, holy shit. I know that not all men are rapists, and that not everyone who talks to me wants to rape me (and I can't believe I seriously have to say that, like I just got a headache just typing that). But every single woman has been harassed by someone they don't know, and we don't know if that person will disrespect our boundaries or not.

I like men. I am marrying one, in fact. This isn't about me liking men, it's about a society that tells women to "deal with it" when we're uncomfortable with someone commenting on our bodies on the way to the grocery store. If you can't empathize with what women go through on a weekly (sometimes daily) basis without making it about YOU and how YOU aren't the problem, then I don't know what to tell YOU, man.

P.S. I could go into a whole thing about how the objectification of women and the message that men are owed a woman and that if they can't acquire one, then they aren't masculine is just as harmful to men as it is to women, so feminism is good for everyone, but I'm not sure it would be received without some additional defensive reaction, BUT I'M JUST SAYING.

P.P.S.
haha

[Clint]

A lot of women tend to dress provocatively. Tight pants, tight shirts, short shorts, tops that show too much boob. I see it all the time. Women wearing clothes that are too small for them. If it's tight against your skin, it doesn't fit.

If you're wearing clothing that shows off your body, then it's expected that that is what people will notice, hence why some men tend to comment on a woman's body. If you aren't dressing provocatively, then I understand being offended by this behavior from men, but if you're showing off your body, and you're offended that people are noticing, that seems a bit contradictory to me.

I think if a stranger complimented my body, I'd feel weird too. It's way too forward of a statement, especially for somebody you don't even know. Plus my body is constantly covered in ticks and leeches, so I'd be wondering why anybody would be complimenting me.

[OceanEyes28]

I guess you're trolling, but consider that there might be a victim of rape and sexual abuse on this forum right now and take it easy on victim blaming.

Sometimes you want to wear tight shit and show some boob. Doesn't mean you want some yahoo shouting at you about how he wants to eat that p*ssy.

I am sorry for being a participant in derailing the thread. Conversation just went that way.

I talk to strangers on the Internet.

[Rowan]

I empathise with anybody who is made to feel uncomfortable by sleazy people. But I wont pretend that these attitudes stem from some sort of patriachy society and instead treat the incidents as they are intended to be treated; as examples of poor behaviour brought upon by bad parenting. What you are talking about isnt so much examples of feminism in my eyes, but more so examples of... common decency? Its that kind of misinterpretation that we have that causes this because your feminism is different to other femnism that I have had the misfortune of having to deal with. I do respect you because you are doing what you think is the right thing, but sometimes I do misunderstand where people come from and I tend to get a little heated. As far as victim blaming goes, I think that its irresponsible to ignore preventative measures that may stop you from being a target of ANY crime, this goes for both men and woman. I'm done and sorry if I offended any of you, I deeply mean that.

[ezio69]

The f**k.

Women can walk around f******g naked, that still doesnt mean you can touch them.

Self- entitled, idiot tools like you who feel like sex or even attention from women is something that is somehow “owed” to them. Pathetic losers.


Boys will be boys. Cause they cant be men.

[alexiuspine]

Please mods can I close this thread right this minute. The same 2 guys have ruined it for everyone else. Again. I'm tired of the underhanded vitriol. This is a forum but please troll elsewhere.

[Rowan]

The f**k.

Women can walk around f******g naked, that still doesnt mean you can touch them.

Self- entitled, idiot tools like you who feel like sex or even attention from women is something that is somehow “owed” to them. Pathetic losers.


Boys will be boys. Cause they cant be men.

bro, you got your head so far up crescent ass, i dont know where you start and she begins. Men dont cut their balls off to please women, only bitches do that. I dont give a shit if I get a warning from this , it needs to be said. You are so full of it, mate.

[Boxman]

Don't really go out of my way to do so. Never mind being socially inept already, I simply don't often care to. Seems more likely to find people with the same interests on forums or websites than out running errands.

Comments about choice in clothing I think are fair game. Everyone is allowed free speech. I don't bother with it myself but it is yet another thing feminism is trying to censor. How come things like "nerd shaming" don't exist? Or rather not recognised? I have not seen a single movement to stop anything offensive to geeks or the way they choose to dress. Same with pretty much any other group or stereotype. If I choose to dress in any particular way, I should expect to recieve appropriate reactions from others.

[octoberpumpkin]

Off topic:

I am actually working with victims of sexual assault and I feel like maybe what the misunderstand is here is that sadly we have a culture of people who blame the victim of sexual abuse, rather than the abuser.

I sometimes dress in a sexier way and have had people look or make comments and I am not personally offended. However, I have been victim of sexual assault by my ex partner, and one thing its important to know is that it is not the victims fault.

I do agree that there are some preventative measures that can be taken, such as never leaving your drink unattended, having a sober friend at a party, etc, that can help prevent sexual assault. HOWEVER, not doing these things in no way justifies the behavior of the rapist. They need to take responsibility for that.

Perhaps I'm a bit jaded after a case of an infant being raped and the fathers justification being "she was walking around in a diaper, how was I supposed to control myself?" Well you were, because that was sick and disgusting.

Again, this is not me saying all men are rapists or there is nothing that can be done to prevent situational rape, as there are steps to take to help decrease your risk. But the rapist is still always at fault, not the victim. It is up to the assaulter to control his own behavior, that is not someone else's responsibility.

[ezio69]

bro, you got your head so far up crescent ass, i dont know where you start and she begins. Men dont cut their balls off to please women, only bitches do that. I dont give a shit if I get a warning from this , it needs to be said. You are so full of it, mate.

Haha oh man

That is rich coming from a lost, angry lil boy who constantly "bitches" and moans about feminism

even moreso than the females here

[LocoColt04]

The f**k.

Women can walk around f******g naked, that still doesnt mean you can touch them.

Self- entitled, idiot tools like you who feel like sex or even attention from women is something that is somehow “owed” to them. Pathetic losers.


Boys will be boys. Cause they cant be men.

ezio, chill pill? Nothing that Rowan said was anything more than opinion. He wasn't targeting women or anything like that, and had a legitimate OPINION about decency. You're right, women could absolutely walk around naked and nobody is entitled to do anything to them because of it, but you need to lay off the offensive a bit.

Please mods can I close this thread right this minute. The same 2 guys have ruined it for everyone else. Again. I'm tired of the underhanded vitriol. This is a forum but please troll elsewhere.

It'll be fine. If it keeps spiraling after this point, we can readdress the issue. Ideally, everyone can just go back to respecting each others' opinions, like earlier in the thread.

[Unknown Entity]

I think this thread pretty much sums up why you should never, ever, ever talk to strangers.

No but seriously guys. Keep on topic from now on. One more comment out of place, warnings will be dished out, and I won't care who's ass you're crawling up.

Having dinner atm, will add more when I get to a decent method of communication!

[LocoColt04]

So... someone closed this. I know who it was and I'll have a conversation about it, but I'm going to reopen the thread because I felt like it should stay open unless you guys proved to me that we couldn't resume normal discussions. Obviously it'll get closed if we can't pick up where we left off before the interruptions, but uh... yeah. Open.

/sigh


edit:
Nevermind, it was closed at the OP's request; the person who closed it failed to leave a note stating that's why it was closed.

[loaf]

Talking to Strangers depends on how you know how to handle them.