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Thread: Shift Comments Thread

  1. #91
    Registered User Shift Comments Thread Kaiden's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I finally caught up on the story. Just been trying to finish some old books


    Oh and I poke a little fun at a Shounen Jump manga in this chapter. Cookies for the person that figures out which manga I'm making a joke about. ^^
    It's the comments about the flashbacks to a minute ago right? I am not sure which you are referring to, but I have seen it in several Shounen manga. Where something happens, then on the next page they are flashing back to show the same event with an explanation of what just happened.


    I really like the development of Haruo. The flashbacks were done very well. Though I wish the teacher would have had something more to do with the breaking out of Haruo as a character, I just don't know how you could have wrote that. The way it happens is fine, just from all the flashbacks I would have thought he played a bigger role.

    Still not a huge fan of Yuki, though he is much better than before. I think a big problem is he reminds me a little of Rand from the wheel of time series and I just never liked Rand as a character either. It’s weird though the more I think about it while writing this post, the less he feels like Rand. I don't know, maybe as the story goes on and he moves further away from his "weak" phase he will grow on me.

    The whole direction of the story is awesome though. So much has happened but I still feel like you have barely scratched the surface of where this could go. The changing of Japan was brilliant (think I mentioned that before). The whole idea of people picking up powers has taken this story in a completely different direction than I ever thought of. There is a level of excitement, learning who has abilities and what they are. I am really looking forward to the next portion of the story.


    Scene from a movie.
    SPOILER!!:
    [Having pulled over a speeding driver.]
    Mac: All right, how about Cat Game?
    Foster: Cat Game? What's the record?
    Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
    Foster: Ten? Starting right meow?
    [They go up to the car.]
    Driver: Sorry about the...
    Foster: All right meow. Hand over your license and registration.
    [The man gives him his license.]
    Foster: Your registration? Hurry up meow.
    Driver: [laughing] Sorry.
    Foster: Is there something funny here boy?
    Driver: Oh, no.
    Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
    [Foster stares at him.]
    Foster: All right meow, where were we?
    Driver: Excuse me, are you saying meow?
    Foster: Am I saying meow?
    Driver: I thought...
    Foster: Don't think boy. Meow, do you know how fast you were going?
    [The man laughs.]
    Foster: Meow. What is so damn funny?
    Driver: I could have sworn you said meow.
    Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milk from a saucer? DO YOU SEE ME EATING MICE?
    [The man is uncontrollably laughing.]
    Foster: You stop laughing right meow!
    Driver: [Stops and swallows hard.] Yes sir.
    Foster: Meow, I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. It's the law.
    [Rips off the ticket and hands it to the man.]
    Foster: Not so funny meow, is it?
    [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows.]
    Foster: Meow!

  2. #92
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well I was behind on getting the chapter up on Sunday, but I actually ended up having most of it already completed. Unfortunately between having no time on Monday and sleeping all of Tuesday I didn't have the time until today. So I finally got Chapter 82 up now.

    This chapter focuses on Yuki a little more despite the fact that Haruo had a really cool moment at the end with his powers awakening. Though being nearly unconscious at the time and fatally wounded really helps with keeping you out of the scene. However, Haruo starts taking the center stage again by the end of the chapter.

    Yuki does manage to steal the show a little with his moves. I keep on displaying some new things with him that he had seen other people do. It is helping to show the range that he had and skill that he has started to develop.

    But it is true Kaiden that several shounen mangas will end up doing quick flashbacks. It is a vague joke, but there was one point in the Naruto manga that there was a flashback of what happened even though you pretty much knew exactly what happened and it was a flashback to like a minute ago, really recent. So it seemed really silly to do.

    I had a little bit of a larger role in mind for Mr. Asunuma, but I ended up cutting because I did not like they it was going to be repeated. In the end he ends up being more of a drama piece for Haruo than anything. There will certainly be more with him later on in story since he is closely linked with Haruo, but for now it was brief.

    I'm afraid I haven't read the Wheel of Time series so I don't know what Rand is like. But there are certainly some people that have told me that they were not fans of Yuki. There is a large enough cast that I think it is completely fine to like someone else. I gave everyone solid personalities and backgrounds so there will probably at least one person that will appeal to you. Yuki still has a lot of growing to do and I think that this sub-arc has been important for him just as much as it is for Haruo since this is really the first time you get to see Yuki in action where he isn't getting totally out classed. I will be making Yuki a more intelligent fighter as well as I have said so that'll make him quite a bit different from how he has appeared.

    And yeah the last half of the first arc has been a lot of excitement about what sort of powers everyone is going to have. But they are just gaining them, so I plan to have them evolve over the story. So they'll be learning new things that they can do with them.

    Enjoy!
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  3. #93
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    What do you know?! I actually made it on Sunday for once. Chapter 83 is now up for reading. I guess my plan for writing throughout the week worked out pretty well. Afraid it still took much too long to write the last three pages, but I should be able to work that out a little better this week since I didn't start on it until Friday. Basically, I'm going to writing a page everyday now rather than all of it on Sunday. This should help me to finally get naturally caught up without expending too much time.

    Well the chapter actually managed to cover Yuki and Haruo pretty equally for the most part. I think in terms of word count Yuki probably got more, but I spent some more time developing Haruo's power. He is probably the first person that has had the time to actually explore his powers more and gain some sort of understanding of them. He's still far from being able to know how to use them, but he's probably further along than anyone else at the moment.

    Yuki closes out the chapter with a really cool moment that is totally classic Shounen Jump material. I ended up changing things at the moment. I had planned on doing what I did for a cliffhanger here somewhere in the middle of the next chapter, but I realized if that I did that it'd just be draggin things on even further. Plus, I did not want to have to make Yuki go through another change in the middle of the fight since it would have been very obvious to those he's fighting. Up until now he has been holding back and keeping things pretty invisible. The ending ends up change that quite a bit. So I'm pretty sure the next chapter is going to be the last one for this sub-arc, though it could be a little on the long side. I still have a bunch of stuff I need to cover so it may still end up spilling in to another chapter, but the end is very near.

    Enjoy!
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  4. #94
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Two in row, looks I like I might actually be getting back to the rhythm of things. Chapter 84 is now up, I had wanted to get it up even earlier today, but I had plans that pulled me away. Because I had actually finished it up like around 1pm in the afternoon if you can believe that. But a lot of that is because of my new writing schedule and having gotten on a roll last night and just writing out nearly the rest of what I had planned for today. It actually all came together very nicely.

    Sad to say that there will be one more chapter to this sub-arc. I had planned on ending it here, but as I was writing it the material I had to put into it and where I was at the time made it pretty clear that I would not be able to reach that point. So I just accepted it and wrote out a very nice chapter with a great moment to leave off on for Haruo.

    I was finally able to reach a point in the sub-arc where Haruo is actually the center and able to do something. Even with his powers awakened there was not a lot he was able to do and Yuki continued to steal the show a fact that I was not completely pleased with happening. It was supposed to be Haruo's sub-arc, but Yuki ends up a focus a lot of the time. However, I was forced to bring in Yuki since Haruo's personality would not have allowed him to join the team without Yuki being there. And a lot of that stuff finally met at a head this chapter.

    All of the building up and development on Haruo has being leading to the moment in this chapter where he comes out of the shadows. Even when he was actually being less passive about everything there was not much he was doing. And the event that I had been waiting for that would break down those walls around Haruo finally happened. I don't know if anyone noticed what I did, but Haruo's pets started out as a large animal and progressively became smaller and weaker in appearance reflecting his own state and confidence. A point that is shown to have changed at the end of the chapter on the cliffhanger where he manages a truly awesome moment of awakening.

    I do fall back to the friendship speak and rolling around in that, but there's not much avoiding that fact. It is going to happen and Haruo doesn't have any friends before Yuki. So friendship ends up being a focal point of the sub-arc. Though for those that realize this, the words that Yuki says have a heavier meaning than just to try to motivate Haruo.

    I also have Katsu make an off hand one line comment about Yuki which will easily go ignored since I was crunched for space. I wanted a longer conversation and banter between them with Katsu remarking that Yuki had a shounen hero appearance with his outfit. But I ended up cutting for the sake of time.

    The last thing is that I actually made the villains in the sub-arc awaken powers and find resolve. Which is a funny point considering it is something that is exclusively reserved for the heroes to do. However I wanted to make a point to break those conventions. I don't know if people will realize it, but I definitely want subtly point out things like that and deconstruct the genre through the story.

    This is a very long commentary on the writing. I guess I've rambled a lot.

    Anyway, enjoy!
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  5. #95
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    It's a little later in the day than last time, but I still managed to get it done on Sunday. This is the final chapter of the sub-arc that focuses on Haruo. I would imagine that as you read it seemed like it could easily have gone into another chapter with how things were nearing the last pages, but I had what I did planned since the beginning of the sub-arc actually. I knew that overall it was going to be a pretty serious and dry at times sub-arc so a little comedy helped to level things out, though Yuki did provide most of it throughout the sub-arc.

    Though speaking about comedy. There were certain moments that I think get a little lost in just being text. The scene I had with Saki and Ayumi is another one of the moments that I think would have totally hilarious to see in actual pictures. The seriousness and flat emotion of Saki and the flailing and surprise of Ayumi being used. It would be such a priceless moment. I really hope at least the idea of what I was doing got across, which was Ayumi being seen as an instant cure item that just needs to be activated. Because that's sort of what they end up being at the end of battles.

    I provide more moments of the villains pulling off some surprising heroics with their actions. They also end up doing more of things that are reserved for the heroes. Which I finally have Yuki make a comment about. Yuki ends up breakin the fourth wall as well in this chapter which I found to be a fun a little moment for anyone that over analyzes how things work in shounen type series.

    I actually end up using this sub-arc to really set some more of the tones that I want to become a little more standard. A lot of it was not really present before except for in small doses. They generally came from Yuki because he is the genre savvy type, though Ayumi has her moments of genre savviness that ends up be quite subtle probably. But since Yuki is actually different than before a lot of my aims to poke fun at the shounen genre will end up coming out of him more. He's got his confidence and cockiness back so that'll end up being played up more as the series goes on. So it should be entertaining to deconstruct and point out things.

    The final sub-arc of the first arc begins next week! Hope you're looking forward to it!

    Enjoy!
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  6. #96
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Chapter 86 is now up! What's that? It is up now? A day early? What's going on with me!? Well I actually ended up finishing this chapter back on Thursday and meant to post it yesterday, but sleep captured me. So it is going up today. I actually had a really good run and knocked it out in three days. Which makes me very happy.

    So this is the final sub-arc of the first arc. It'll be pretty clear that it will also not be the only chapter for the sub-arc. The appearance of things would say that it will be a 3 or 4 chapter sub-arc. It certainly won't be extremely lengthy, but there are a number of things that'll need to happen and as a result it will take sometime.

    Part of that reason is things in this chapter when longer than I thought they were going to be, but I had fun and it was a nice change of pace from everything else. So I think what happened was a good thing, plus it also work into the development of Yumi more. This chapter will feel a little weird probably because its mood is quite a bit different from any of the others in the fact that it'll feel more like a romance story. But since I work on Yumi's unrequited crush on Yuki that is to be expected. However, I work in several factors into the chapter that will all be very important pieces. So it is certainly not a wasted chapter by any means. I plan on using everything that happens in the chapter for later work.

    Enjoy!
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  7. #97
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Hey it's Friday and I'm posting up Chapter 87! Well Saturday early morning, but hey it's happened once again. I'd better be careful or I'll start to make this into a habit. Anyway, I actually did finish the chapter tonight and not on Thursday like last week, but that was due to some sleep issues.

    So this chapter ends up delaying some of the things that I had planned, but there was some really good stuff that came out. I actually was just writing with what Yuki, Momoko and Saki wanted to say. It was not me really thinking out anything when I was doing. Which is pretty nice, because I really like how it turned out with them. There was a lot of emotions riding and a couple of points that had been running under the scenes throughout finally get spoken out loud.

    Saki and Yuki have a nice little scene and I continue to push and hint towards things between Yuki and Ayumi. Though Saki is hardly subtle about any of it, so I guess you can't really say that I'm hinting anymore huh? It's a little weird having this sub-arc being so much about romance. Though romance in general in a Shounen in a little on the odd side, but I had planned that for number of reason, one of them being that they just get ignored so much. There are hints of things, but nothing almost ever happens unless the very end. I understand that its very Japanese, from what people tell me, but even still dragging out what is pretty clear that you're hinting at just seems a little too cruel. So I won't be dancing around romance in favor of fighting and action. It will have a time and place and serve a very important role in the plot and development of the characters. So it is very integrual to the story.

    Enjoy!
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  8. #98
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm doing pretty good keeping up with this. Let's hope I can continue to manage it through everything. This makes Chapter 88 now. The plan ended up getting modified a little in the course of writing these last two chapters. There was not going to be the whole conversation with Saki, but it ended up taking on a life of its own during the last chapter and so I ended up here with Saki. Which I don't think it is a bad thing, it actually made the flow of this chapter a lot better.

    It was originally planned just to be an internal debate between Yuki and his problems. Which would have been fine in printed pictures, but it would have probably gotten fairly taxing being just text. It was a part that I was worried about dealing with since I wanted to get everything out that I did in this chapter with only Yuki to go by. However, the introduction of Saki back into the equation balanced everything out and actually managed to provide some release and resolution for Yuki which was simply going to be left hanging on him.

    The change has possibly altered the schedule, but that is hard to know at the moment. This tends to more of an art than a science at times. I just left everything flow at the rate that feels right for it. But because this chapter was completely filled up by the Yuki and Saki conversation it is probably likely that I'll be requiring another two chapters to complete this sub-arc and not just the one. Either way it will be coming to an end soon.

    Enjoy!
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  9. #99
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm later than normal, but that is only for posting. I actually finished the chapter on Thursday, but I was playing Starcraft II on Thursday, Friday and today so that consumed a lot of time. But it's out of the way now, so I'm getting around to it. So Chapter 89 is now up and ready.

    I guess once again I'm a little off on what was planned, but I don't know if it is going to be a serious deal this time. I had planned on having the entire conversation between the fairy and the group to be done in this chapter, but her arrival seemed like a good enough place as any to end things on.

    The next chapter will naturally focus on the conversation and the final preparation that going to be made before the end. It has been rather funny how I've been giving Yumi more coverage in this sub-arc. I've been liken the way that she has started to develop in these chapters. She's still pretty passive, but that is starting to work out of that and become assertive. Nothing wrong with a little more development for her, see did not get a lot of focus in the last sub-arc for her since Yori was the focus (due to him not having a focus the last time around).

    It has also worked out to have her the center due to the powers that she has. Her powers still remained very subtle, but if you've read between the lines in what happened then you probably have an idea. But finding a natural way to get everyone together was one of the problems that I was having and Yumi actually solved some of it. Though the answers will not be so forthcoming on how until much later. I can't give you all of the answers immediately. ;p

    Enjoy!
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  10. #100
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Chapter 90 is up now. I'm nearing chapter 100 for this series, which is already the longest I've done and the 100th chapter is going to be quite the milestone.

    This chapter I was not sure how much I was going to be able to put into it. I've still got a few things left to do before I can end the sub-arc. So the next chapter will be either heavily packed with things or I'll be doing yet one more chapter for the sub-arc. So much for it being a short little 3 or 4 chapter deal huh? It's already up to five chapters and will be 6 or 7 before everything is completed.

    As you read in the last chapter the fairy makes her return. She had a brief spot in the last sub-arc and made some infrequence appearances before. She'll be more of a reoccurring character at this point. I've considered her the mascot on the series after I created her a while back. So I had planned on using her more later on, mostly once the third major arc started up. Since the third arc will be back in Japan and I'm not planning on taking the fairy with Yuki into the homeland. I'll have some fun with her since she be one of my devices to poke at the characters and myself at times as well as the genre. She's already made nicknames for three of the characters and by the time the third arc comes around she'll have made nicknames for the remaining ones.

    I've been having fun with Yumi lately in this sub-arc. She's been getting a lot of face time and developing and growing. I'm liking the direction of leadership that I'm driving her towards. It'll help to break her away from her passive self into a decisive individual that can take charge. Considering her type in such shows is never front and center or leading the charge she'll be breaking the mold. Which is something that I enjoy doing.

    The only one that I really got to do time with was Seiji, but it had been a while since he had been since. So it is good to get him some time to take center stage. The rest of the characters will be getting their chance in the next chapter and depending on where things fall they'll be confronting Yuki as well.

    Enjoy!
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  11. #101
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    What's going on here I'm posting on a Tuesday a new chapter of all things? I mean seriously, could I be actually working to catch back up to where I should be? It might be possible. Anyway, Chapter 91 is now up. I was fortunate to have gotten started on it Saturday and plowed through it Sunday and Monday without very little effort. It did end up being longer in length than I planned, barely breaking the seven page limit I try not to break. However, I knew exactly where I wanted to end the chapter and so I pushed for it.

    This chapter is a little more all over the place than recent chapters, but as you probably were expecting I have some characters to cover. So you get to see their answers for this chapter. They all get a little time and one of the other things I knew that I had to do was provide reasons or explanations to how high school students are going to be allowed to go off somewhere on their own when they all actually have parents. Unlike other Shounen settings where the characters either don't have parents, have parents that fight too or don't care about their children or the setting just means that leaving and fighting are going to be nature my story is not like that. Well except for Haruo, but well that's Haruo for you.

    So I wanted to make sure that I provided a view of how they are allowed to do what they do. Which as you can imagine involves quite a bit of lying, but it is addressed. I think liked the way I did it with Yori and Yumi the best, just because Yori was so skillful in handling the situation that he actually made it seem like it was not his idea to take Yumi with him. The guy is a natural politician even though he totally hates the idea.

    I end on a continuing sub-plot that I have been running for the cliffhanger. So you'll get to see a little more of that. But so long as the next chapter does not run longer than planned it should be the last of the sub-arc and arc. Yay! I will also hopefully have it done by the end of the week putting my one chapter closer to being back on schedule.

    Enjoy!
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  12. #102
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Hey I'm back again before the week was out! Though later than I wanted. I had planned on getting done sooner, but accidental sleep during the week ruined those plans. Anyway, this is Chapter 92 now and it is up for reading!

    You remember how I was saying if the chapter didn't run too longer that the sub-arc would finish in this chapter. Well it turns out that the chapter did run too longer. I actually had an ending for it breaking into page 7. When I looked at it and thought about it I really didn't like how rushed it was going to be. And knowing the fact that I would have to carry over even more things into the next arc because I couldn't fit it all into this chapter.

    So I decided it was just best to cut the chapter shorter, back around the five page mark and move the rest into the next chapter. So by accident I actually have nearly half of the next chapter written. Which will certainly make writing it a lot easier. I am one chapter closer to being completely caught up now though. So I'm pleased about that fact as well.

    This chapter covers a lot of ground still bouncing around to different times and places with people. It is all in linear order though by time's reading. So that is not a worry. And I started to work on the group dynamics already with a few of the characters. I had already begun a little when they met before, but this really helps to set some of the characters into some comfortable positions. I do have a lot of fun at Seiji's expense though, but he's a fun target. He's so serious half of the time and too dense the rest.

    Enjoy!
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  13. #103
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    This probably would have been up sooner if I had Tuesday available to me. Anyway, this is most certainly the conclusion to the sub-arc and main arc, though it still end with a bit of a cliffhanger. So it is not really going to feel so much like the end, but a continuation. The avenue is changing though and the purpose, which is what is going to be defining the next arc. Chapter 93 is now up.

    The funny thing is that I thought that even though I pushed out part of the last chapter into this one that I would have room to expand. I ended up not really having any room to expand on things. I did a little in places, but overall I was working on getting in everything that I wanted. So the chapter will probably feel a little on the light and quick side of things.

    It is another pretty heavy dialogue chapter though with the entire thing taking place over the course of like a few minutes or so. It is actually surprising how I can so easily fill up five pages with conversation. And it is not really even me trying it is me playing with the characters and doing what they would do in the situation.

    The long awaited answer, which I actually end up giving out partially in the pilot I wrote was finally done. You'll have that to look forward to in the chapter. There were a couple of things that I had been holding back on leaving the whole thing a mystery for the time being. I knew everything that was going to be happening, but I did not really feel like coming out and saying things quite so soon. Not to mention it makes for a nice punch at the end of the arc to find out something pretty major.

    Also I'm going to be coming up to my 100th chapter soon. I'm already planning out a special issue for it that will actually cover the past. So it will be a fun chapter that will reveal a little about things before the series got started.

    Enjoy!
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  14. #104
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well it's longer than I had planned on getting it, but accidental sleep sort does that to you. Anyway, Chapter 94 is now up. This is the new arc and new sub-arc! Things probably are not as exciting at the moment, but there is build up going on. I also do a little answering questions on why I'm doing something this way.

    This chapter ended up being more about Ayumi. Though I had already planned on the whole arc being a lot about Ayumi. By the time that the arc finishes you should have a really good understanding of Ayumi and her history. She is a pretty multi-faceted and that is starting to show through. I have been having it show through here and there. So there will be little glimpses of the real Ayumi under all of the hardened warrior that she puts on.

    This sub-arc will be really short and I'll probably end up finishing it off the next chapter. They'll be arriving in Antarctica by then and the real journey will begin. I've got quite of bit planned for that as you can imagine. This is going to be a pretty heavy fighting arc as will most of the story from this point on. It probably start hitting into that very much Shounen Jump feel at this point. I had a lot of fighting in the first arc, but there was a lot of character building too. The bulk of that is out of the way so character development will for a while anyway be about their powers growing as they figure them out. I still have a lot of little pieces left for the characters but it won't be front ended.

    Enjoy!
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  15. #105
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I would have had this done a long time ago had not gotten stumped while working on it. I ended up having to do the bulk of it the last two days because I just could not make any head way on it. This was despite the fact that I knew exactly what I was going to happen. Anyway, Chapter 95 is now up and this is it for the introduction sub-arc, which was just for travel. The next sub-arc will be lasting for quite sometime though as it covers all of the time until reaching the capital of Atlantis.

    I knew there was not going to be a lot going on for this chapter which made things a little difficult to completely justify two chapters, but I knew it would be too much of a rush for one. But I did manage to keep with my trend of setting up things. I'm continuing the drama revolving around Yumi and her developing jealousy, which she doesn't really understand at the moment. This may seem strange that someone doesn't recognize their own jealousy, but I think it is actually probably a fairly common occurrence. It is compounded by the fact that Yumi has never really had a crush or been in love before, so experience such deep and overwhelm emotions as love born jealousy is something foreign to her. But don't worry, she's not dumb and will figure out it soon enough. The complicated triangle by Yumi, Ayumi and Yuki will continue to be developed through the arc.

    I think I mentioned it before, but it is a little funny that I've been focusing so much on the romantic tensions between them. I think it is good thing though, since Shounen tends to avoid those subjects, a point I think I also made before. It will be something that I will continue to do to set things apart. And Yuki won't be the only one with romance. I've already got several characters planned out and can sort of see the hints on one that I've been developing lightly the last few chapters. I think you know who I'm talking about and I think they make a pretty couple.

    The fighting between Seiji and Chiharu is pretty reduntant, but there were a couple of points that I wanted to make that the fight itself was not the most important part of what happened it just happen to be the device that I needed to deal with other matters. The end of the fight is where the focus is actually on despite how brief it actually it. As I said above, I setting up things and the fight set up one relationship and helped to demonstrate something else.

    But they're on Antarctica now and Atlantis is ahead of them. I believe it is only going to be a chapter or two before I reach the borders of Atlantis, but there is going to be a lot of explanations coming. You're probably expecting them, since I've left a lot of things unexplained right now. I'm not going to do a huge info dump on you, but you'll recieve information as a fairly even pace at this point about Atlantis and the history. So look forward to it.

    Enjoy!
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  16. #106
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well I'm late, but something I couldn't have planned for happened. Injury by car accident. Fortunately, it was minor, but it still made it difficult to concentrate on what I needed to do. So it ended up delaying my efforts for quite sometime. Quite annoying when something comes up to get in my way just as I'm nearly caught up. Anyway, I'll have to work on rushing out the next chapter in order to get back to where I was. Chapter 96 is up now though.

    The more I thought about the chapter more I wondered how slow it might be and empty it might appear. There is a lot of just dialogue through the whole thing and since Haruo's sub-arc there hasn't been any fighting either. But that will be changing soon enough. Depending on how I pace the chapters it could be happening very soon. But all of the traveling to Atlantis is over now. I sprinted through it quickly since there was not much point in dwelling on something boring like the trip.

    Atlantis is before them and that is when things get exciting. So hang in there for the next chapter which will start finally explaining how Atlantis has been left alone for so long. It should be pretty exciting stuff.

    Enjoy!
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  17. #107
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm not late, but I'm still just as behind. I've at least kept the chapter coming though. Chapter 97 is up now.

    Some of the truth about Atlantis is revealed in the chapter. The tension is increased again with new dangers being presented. The action won't be in this chapter, but it will be coming in the next chapter. So you can look forward to that. This is still early in the arc, so this is just the opening volley as it were.

    I've been working hard to make sure that everyone gets some face time in the chapters. Eventually it'll become less of a consider as everyone is going to have their own fights and get to really show themselves for a little while. But most of that won't happen for a while. Still things are going quite well I think the only one that easily gets forgotten is Haruo because he doesn't have a lot to say. If this was an actual manga he'd be visible. I do feel that having nine team members is putting things right at the limit of being too many. That'll get managed better as the arc goes on though with the plans that I have.

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  18. #108
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well at least I'm not further behind, though it was a serious consideration. Anyway, Chapter 98 is up now. This chapter ended up being a lot more lighthearted than I had originally planned. The entire start of the chapter was completely unplanned, but something that I got inspired to write. So it probably feel a little out of character, but it is just one of those totally out of story moments where everything is silly and there is nothing serious going on.

    Even still it was a lot of fun to write it out. I got to get some kicks in. The meat of the chapter ends up taking place in the last half after things get more serious, sort of. The promised action shows up, but goes away just as quickly. Sorry, it was never intended to be very long. It was just to be an actual introduction to Saki's powers. I've never actually sat down with her powers and gave anything about them, which was certainly done intentionally. I never planned on revealing them opening and acknowledging them until this moment. It is not really a huge grand reveal, but it is certainly an impressive on considering what she did. But since she technically already had her reveal nearly 40 chapter ago, never needed to be huge. But I give words to what her power is, which I had already hinted and displayed before.

    I re-introduce the clock and deadline, which has been silently running since the first chapter. I've brought it up a few times, but since the deadline is coming up fast it'll end up playing more of an importance from now on. Expect to get some more answers about Atlantis in the next chapter.

    Also I decided to do a little work on how the main characters would speak to each other when using more traditional Japanese behavior. Since I leave out honorifics and most of the typical manners of Japanese to reflect what you'd find in a translated manga. I decided to do the work for it since honorifics and name usage holds significant meanings in terms of how the relationships between them are viewed.

    Yuki
    Saki
    Ayumi-san
    Seiji
    Mizuno-sempai
    Yumi-chan
    Terauchi-sempai
    Chiharu-chan
    Haruo-kun

    Saki
    Yuki
    Ayumi-san
    Seiji-kun or baka
    Mizuno-sempai
    Yumi-chan
    Terauchi-sempai
    Chiharu-chan
    Yoneda-san

    Ayumi
    Yuki
    Furukawa-san
    Mizuno-san
    Mizuno-san
    Tsuji-san or baka
    Terauchi-san
    Chinen-san
    Yoneda-san

    Seiji
    Yuki
    Saki-chan
    Nishimura-san
    Mizuno-san
    Mizuno-san
    Terauchi-san or sempai
    Chiharu-chan
    Yoneda-san

    Yori - Note: All of the girls in school call him Mizuno-sama or Yori-sama depending on how well they know him. This is only partly because he's student council president, but also because he's so popular and handsome. He has his own fan club, explains a few things.

    Hayashi-san
    Furuwara-san
    Tsuji-san
    Yumi
    Nishimura-san
    Terauchi-sempai
    Chinen-san
    Yoneda-san

    Yumi
    Yuki-san or kun
    Ayumi-chan
    Tsuji-san
    Yori
    Ayumi-san
    Terauchi-sempai
    Chiharu-chan
    Yoneda-san

    Fumiko
    Hayashi-kun
    Nishimura-chan
    Furukawa-chan
    Tsuji-kun
    Mizuno-san
    Mizuno-chan
    Chiharu-chan
    Yoneda-san

    Chiharu
    Hayashi-baka
    Furukawa-san
    Tsuji-baka
    Nishimura-san
    Mizuno-san
    Mizuno-san
    Terauchi-san
    Yoneda-san

    Haruo
    Hayashi-san
    Furukawa-san
    Tsuji-san
    Nishimura-san
    Mizuno-san
    Mizuno-san
    Terauchi-san
    Chinen-san

    Enjoy!
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  19. #109
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Alright, Chapter 99 is up now as well. I had a pretty fast turn around on this one. I don't know why, I managed to be really motivated and knock it out quickly. This places me at being "officially" caught up. I'm actually like a chapter or two behind, but with what I'm comparing against I'm back to where I wanted to be. So things will be progressing at a normal pace once again. I'm going to be also going back and working on getting out my other series again. ><

    Anyway, this chapter is that info dump I talked about that really didn't happen in the last chapter. Most of this chapter is a history lesson and getting some questions answered. I'm naturally leaving a lot out still, but it is getting somethings out there. I wanted to be able to explain how Atlantis is pretty early, since it is important for the sake of believability. It also links back to something else I did, which will make sense when you read if you haven't already. And I mention it there in the chapter anyway.

    I introduce some new characters and the threat that Yuki and company will be facing. So you can expect to get some fighting out of them. There is going to be more details coming in the next chapter, which won't be for two weeks. Since as I explained, my 100th chapter is going to be a special issue that revolves around Yuki's past. It'll break from the current arc, but still remain relevant to the story and characters. I think it'll be a really fun chapter with what I have planned.

    Enjoy!
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  20. #110
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Chapter 100 is up now! This is the special chapter. It's part of the overall story, but not part of the current arc. It is a bit of an one-shot since it is all self contained. As I say in the chapter, chapter 101 will resume the normal arc story without further interruptions.

    I was actually very excited to write this chapter. I've been thinking about it for like a month or two since I decided to do something special for the 100th chapter. So I nearly wrote it all in one sitting, which I haven't done in a while. I polished off the little bit I had left tonight.

    This chapter has a completely different mood from any of the other chapters in the entire story. It is very happy and sweet like there is nothing at wrong in the world. The contrast to the current story makes it stand out quite a bit. That is part of the intention and it almost feels tragic and sad knowing how happy and carefree Yuki was when he was a child and how different he is now. Depending on your view and emotions, it could be a little difficult to read, it was for me at times. Because you wish Yuki could go back to why things used to be. I put in so many little things that show things used to be before everything go broken.

    There is also a really big surprise that I put as well. This was planned since the beginning, though I hadn't planned on starting to make those connections so soon. But considering that it is the 100th chapter and something to celebrate I thought that I would give you all a little something extra. Not to mention it is actually going to play some important roles later into the story anyway. So all this is doing is seeding early what I had already planned out.

    So yeah, it is a carefree chapter, but I still manage to drop in new mysteries and questions at the same time. So it remains a very important and meaningful chapter even when considering the plot.

    Enjoy!
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  21. #111
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well this one came a little later in the week, but still prior to Sunday which is the end goal. So Chapter 101 is up and the story resumes back at where I left it two chapters ago. Most of the chapter is just building tension at this point.

    You know that they're being tracked and they assume it. They are in need a rest and a little more world building. More of that will actually come in the next chapter than in this one. I only touch on it in a little bit. I'm weighing out things for the next chapter, but things will start to pick up in the action sense.

    Plus Ayumi and Yumi are going to be alone for a while. So that should provide for some interesting drama. The most important parts happen in the last half of the chapter and especially the cliffhanger. That is where a lot of the things are weighted. It will also start to be the driving tension for Yuki going on.

    Enjoy!
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  22. #112
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    It took me longer to get around to doing Chapter 102, but I ended up getting side tracked during the week. So I didn't really get to work on it until the weekend. But the chapter is up now!

    Well the action didn't really come in this chapter like I thought. As I figured things got drawn out really easily between the two scenes that I wanted to do. They are important building blocks. And I realized that they would seem a little difficult to place after the events that will be coming shortly. So I knew I had to do it now and just hold off on the action.

    The romance drama between Ayumi and Yumi stirs up again. I know I mention it before, but it is rather amusing knowing that this is a Shounen series and I'm introducing this much romantic tension between characters. It is not going to be the only time either. I have planned couples and break ups all along the story. I'm not going to shy away from it. But those annoyed with Yumi's blindness over jealousy should be relieved now. Though it does now present new tensions.

    The other piece deals with Yori and Fumiko, which I had a lot of debate over. One of the reason the chapter didn't get finished as fast as it could have. I debated the points and how to make it work. In the end I did as planned I just managed to get through with some reasoning that mostly works out. I did end up cutting out a few things from the chapter for the sake of length.

    But with these elements finished for the time being the action will be coming in the next chapter. Though it will just be building action. The real stuff won't hit until the chapter afterward. Yeah, I know I'm a big tease, aren't I? I don't know how of an action scene it'll be, but it will certainly be bigger than the one with Saki totally owning everyone. It will definitely fill a chapter and perhaps two. We'll have to see what happens. Anyway, things will really start rolling up some steam with this though.

    Enjoy!
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  23. #113
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Another Sunday posting for me, though this time it is due to illness that I got delayed. But anyway, I still managed to stay on schedule despite it. Chapter 103 is now up and the action is coming as promised.

    Like I said last time this is all just building action at this point. The next chapter will have the actual real stuff happening. So you will finally get to have a real fight for once, since it has been more than ten chapters since the last one. ^^; So much for being a Shounen Jump huh? No non-stop fighting. Well, it is not like I'm planning on fights all of the time, though that will end up coming later in the arc.

    This chapter closes the door on Yori's discovery, though not really leaves it completed. It is just another piece to the puzzle. I actually end up spending a fair amount of time with the enemy at this point. So it is split between them and everyone else. Yuki is caught with a moral dilemma for a cliffhanger that you probably know how it is going to turn out. Things will be getting more tense for few chapters.

    Enjoy!
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  24. #114
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm getting behind on this again, though I didn't have the time last weekend and things sort of got in my way during the last week. So I didn't get it done until today, not like I wanted. Anyway, Chapter 104 is up now even if it is quite a bit late. I'll be starting on the next shortly since I have to get it out in time so that I can work on Chapter 106. The annoying thing is that I finished the last two pages in an hour while the rest took significantly longer.

    So I as I said before the action gets started. Though also like I said nothing too big for this chapter it is just getting the pieces in place. The real stuff will happen in the chapter. Another glimpse into Yumi and Yori's powers will be given in the next chapter so you can look forward to that happening. Fumiko will finally get to use her powers, but you can expect it to be more difficult than she thinks.

    Seiji and Yuki get to fight side by side again. I've always like the two of them together. They fit together nicely, part of that certainly comes from their history with each other, but Yuki and Seiji are similar in many ways. Though Yuki does actually have more intelligence than Seiji, even if it doens't always seem that way. Seiji just a lot of fun for being so narrowminded in his actions. It does make him rather easy to write and a bit of a parody on the standard Shounen Jump hero, even though as I've mentioned before that Saki is more like the normal Shounen Jump hero.

    I do keep language a continuing factor. A point that is often ignored by just about any one. I almost wanted to make a joke about the fact that they are speaking in English even though they are Japanese and making a fourth wall comment about being translated. I refrained myself from making such a joke though.

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  25. #115
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm caught up now, technically, even though I only have another day before the next chapter is due. This one took far longer than it should for me. The last bit came together fast though as seems to be the trend. Well Chapter 105 is up now.

    The action and fighting finally begins now, though it is more tension at times than action. But Fumiko finally gets to make another debut. I tried to pay a lot of attention to the fact that a lot of them don't know how to fight or what to do a fighting situation. So they are going to be doing really poorly for a while. But part of what is going to be happening in these fights are getting them experience and used to it. So I hope to be able to show that improvement and change in their demeanor over the course of the arc.

    And as promised I do a little more with Yumi. I don't end up going into a details about what her power is as I'm still teasing it. However, the next chapter will actually end up showing more of her powers. This chapter was a big tease for her and build up for the next one. Yori will also get a little more attention, but most of it is going to be Yumi.

    Considering the way the chapter played out it is possible the fight in the village could fall over into a third chapter. I did not get any time for Yuki and Seiji who started their fight in the end of the chapter before. But there is nothing to be worried about. They will be getting some attention in the next chapter. A lot of things will come to a head in the next chapter with the soldiers and Yuki's friends.

    Enjoy!
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  26. #116
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Now I'm actually caught up! Chapter 106 I'm glad to see is up now. So long as nothing strange happen I am back on my normal schedule and I should be able to get something out during the week rather than relying on the weekend like before. The stupid illness.

    Anyway, this was a fun chapter to write. And I did seem to come out with needing another chapter to wrap up the fighting, but hey it is more action in an action series. So it is not all bad, especially since it's been lacking for a while. The most fun was definitely had to be found with Yuki and Seiji. They do have a fun dynamic and Seiji is always entertaining. I end up doing some fourth wall breaking here, but I couldn't resist it. It is actually a bit of a joke to things that happen at times in anime and manga. I had planned out Yuki and Seiji's fights to be something a lot bigger and more involved than it ended up, but then the funny thought came to and I ran with it. I love the results, because they have some fun lines between them.

    Yuki and Seiji got left out of the last chapter, a point I thought about joking about as well, but one fourth wall joke is enough. I did end up leaving out Fumiko though. I was actually thinking about having her in the chapter and finish up her fight, but then I realized that I promised more Yumi and I did totally tease her last chapter as the cliffhanger. So just the opening number of the chapter didn't really seem fair. So I knew I had to finish her bit and it was a very awesome moment for her. The aftermath with her brother will be very interesting, but Yumi had a great moment. I finally put her powers on display for everyone. I still don't spell out what her powers actually are, but the display she had should be enough to give you clues. And there are clues to her powers back in the first arc during her second sub-arc. I hinted at it there without actually coming out and saying it. So those paying close attention should be able to put two and two together.

    The cliffhanger this time was very nice and what I had planned as the back up if I didn't wrap up the fighting. So you'll get to see Yuki fight it out next chapter and Fumiko finish up her fight as well. Then they get to deal with the aftermath. I don't expect to get to the aftermath until the following chapter. So look forward to a full chapter of Fumiko and Yuki's fights.

    Enjoy!
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  27. #117
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    So much for being caught up huh? Too many distractions last week knocked me off. Anyway, I'm actually sort of caught up thought I know I'm still going to be behind since I have to finish tomorrow and I have plans. But anyway, Chapter 107 is now up.

    So yeah, you know that plan to wrap up all of the fighting and action this chapter? Yeah, that didn't happen. But I guess my long windedness is your benefit. Since the fighting will continue on for another chapter. I ended up giving nearly the entire chapter over to Fumiko, she could use it. Though Yumi did not get nearly that much, but she still had a lot of the last chapter.

    Despite all of that though, the fighting is fairly brief. It is just a lot of tension really. Still Fumiko got to do some pretty cool stuff and she closes out the chapter as well. I left things on a pretty big cliffhanger too. The whole fight sort of got out of my control and went on its own direction. I'm actually fairly happy with that too since I don't want flat out victories. I want some loses as well or something in between.

    Yuki still got the pre-title space even though Fumiko got everything else. But seeing as he was the ending cliffhanger for the last chapter that sort of made sense. And he got to do something really cool as well. It was a pretty cool scene, especially if it was in pictures. But the next chapter will wrap up Fumiko's fight as well as Yuki's fight. There is very little left to Fumiko's fight, but it will still probably take up a sizeable part of the chapter. Yuki will get the rest though.

    Enjoy!
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  28. #118
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    Well I'm getting further behind aren't I? I finished the work Sunday, but it was just too late to post it. So I'm doing that now. Fortunately, Christmas is coming so I'll be able to catch up. But for now Chapter 108 is now up!

    This chapter finally resolves all of the fighting in the village. Which happened to last a fair bit longer than originally planned. But hey, you were probably needing some good action anyway. There are some pretty exciting moments overall that happened the only thing that I feel a little sad about is that Yuki seemed pretty boring compared against the others. Since he's find a style he's not all over the place. So I'll have to work on finding some interesting things to do with him.

    But the fun parts were with Fumiko. I left her with a lot of burdens to bare now that she lost control of herself in the moment. I hardly call that a win. So she got a tie or a loss, depending on the point of view. She'd see it as a loss since she lost control. But still it'll probably some good drama and tension for her through the arc. I've got plenty of things to play with for most of the cast. So it won't be Yuki's that is the only with troubles on his mind.

    And now the aftermath of the fighting comes. I left that out on a cliffhanger. I knew that I was going to have to do that since I have a lot planned for the aftermath. It should still only a chapter, but it'll take up most of it I'm figuring. There are going to be a few things that they are going to have to deal with. And not everyone's goin to be happy being saved.

    Enjoy!
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    2007 and 2009 Best Writer of TFF and 2009 Most Creative Co-Winner



  29. #119
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    I'm actually finally truly and really caught up! Well I still technically need to write for this week, but I still have 6 days to go, right? Right?! Anyway, Chapters 109, 110 and 111 are all up now. Yeah, you read that right. I just posted 3 chapters. Think of it as a late Christmas present. I ended up delaying posting the ones I had until I had all 3 finishes so I could just be caught up not deal with the lag.

    Since I posted all 3 at the same time I'm not going to worry about three comments posts. That just seems like I'm trying to milk posts or something. Anyway, 109 and 110 focus on resolving the final matter that I cliffhanged you all on like two weeks ago? All of the aftermath gets pretty tense and it is not really as smooth as I wanted, but it still turned out the way I wanted. So I guess I can't really complain about the results. Just the method.

    Since the action got resolved these chapters focus more heavily on dialogue and conversation. They build in the growing direction of things to come. The chapters 109 and 110 work on the whole angle that Yuki's not going to be able to make everyone happy. That is going to be on going driving theme with things. Bad stuff is going to happen to good people and there's nothing really good that is going to come out of it. And the people that indirectly caused will have to feel the weight of those consequences. I want to continue working with the fact that not everything will be happy endings and actions do have repercussions that will be seen. So if something bad happens they'll have to face it in time if not shortly afterward.

    With the ending of the incident in Skoupa matters will be moving a little faster. I finally sorted out the rest of the sub-arc in more detail. I knew what I wanted before just not how I wanted to do it. I know that now. Unfortunately, one of the reasons I didn't finish 111 until today was because of the problems I faced getting down what I wanted. 112 is going to be more challenging, but it is going to be more character focused.

    Chapter 111 ends up taking a different turn completely and focusing solely on the enemy. I've continued to give little pieces of insight into them through their brief moments of controlling the narrative, but this is the first time it was fully them carrying it. I didn't not do nearly the amount of character development for Simonides as I would have liked, but there is still time for him. Like any good manga, I'll be giving you the view into the enemy and making them someone that you can also sympathize with. And considering the way that I'm painting them it is probably really easy to sympathize with them at times. They're just protecting themselves.

    I finally got to do more with Demosthenes as well since he's been pretty much unseen since Chapter 60 with the small exception of Chapter 100. Demosthenes is a complicated character and I will be spending more time getting into his head. I've laid out the ground work for them though. But all of his mysteries won't be revealed until the end of the arc.

    With the plans I have laid out for the remaining chapters of the sub-arc I'm guessing that there will be probably another 20 chapters easily before it concludes and moves into the third sub-arc. At that point they'll reach Atlantis and the serious action begins as well as all of the mysteries that I've been building since the first chapter.

    Enjoy!
    Curious? There's no limits but your own imagination.
    Don't know how to roleplay, but want to learn? Visit Here!


    2007 and 2009 Best Writer of TFF and 2009 Most Creative Co-Winner



  30. #120
    The Quiet One Shift Comments Thread Andromeda's Avatar
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    Re: Shift Comments Thread

    So much for being caught up huh? This last chapter ended up being a pain to write and finish. So it dragged on for far too long. But the chapter is finally finished, Chapter 112 is up now.

    For anyone that has already read the chapter I'll open with this, I'm an evil person for the cliffhanger I wrote. I know it. It's a really mean cliffhanger. Speaking of it, I had it originally written differently, but as I thought about it more it did make a lot of sense to me. Well it did, in the sense that is the way everything plays out in stories. But I wanted to limit the sorts of problems like that that I run into. The case of if the enemy actually made full use of their abilities the heroes would be dead. So I said yeah, I can't have that being the way things go. Everyone would be like why didn't they just wait two second longer and do the job right. So I did the job right. And I already know how the next chapter is going to go.

    The break from the action ended up being pretty short this time. Only a few chapters before we're back into fighting again. It is an action manga, so if there isn't a lot of fighting then it gets a little weird. But it is a balancing act. I'm planning on doing more of the development and turmoil through the fighting rather than in silence. I think it will work out better and mix in well. Plus their willingness to fight, the dilemma and the fight will all get tied and related to each other.

    The next chapter will be fun for what I have planned out. I suspect that this little bit will last for 2-3 chapters probably.

    Enjoy!
    Curious? There's no limits but your own imagination.
    Don't know how to roleplay, but want to learn? Visit Here!


    2007 and 2009 Best Writer of TFF and 2009 Most Creative Co-Winner



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