Okay, so the title was bad. I thought of it on the top of my head.
This is ... a work. Not a really good one, just one I happened to write for practise during the summer vacay for my friend.
Meaning it's not really edited and fixed for grammar and such.
I want some outside opinions, so I posted here. If some harsh critique is needed.. please say. I would very much like to hear anything that comes to the mind.
Here we go..
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My jaw dropped wide open, eyes bulged with shock, taking in what lay in my view. Big, enormous, huge. And that was only a part of it.
Candy land
Not just any candy land, but my land, filled with irresistible and teeth rotting goodness. Everywhere, chocolate filed mountains lay over the horizon. Rows of giant lollipops, hills of assorted flavored ice cream, fluffy marshmallow balls filled the space between the strawberry flavored river and the chocolate mountains. On my right a dark chocolate table, chairs, and eating utensils over the vanilla decked platform.
Straightening myself out, I carefully walked over the sticky candy grass and made my way to the strawberry river. Crouching down, I dipped my fingers and licked the pink stuff.
An immediate sweetness filled my tongue. Nice and balanced; not too dull or overly sweet. The taste of the strawberry extract satisfied my growling hunger. I licked my lips, and realized I was dehydrated. I gulped down more strawberry flavor.
Satisfied, I stood and started looking around. Besides the chocolate mountains, the rest of the area was covered with dense forests that were separated by a blue ocean. I frowned. This side reminded me of some place in the real world.
My eyebrows furrowed as I thought. Real world, which meant that this, candy land, was nothing but a dream. The realization disheartened me. I wanted to live here: a place free from adults, nobody having to tell me what to do, what to eat. In fact, nobody telling me to do anything, period. Sure it may get lonely, but at least people weren’t causing a ruckus all the time.
Instead of finding a way out, I found myself sampling and eating other treats. I tasted vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, lime, lemon, orange, apple, grape, cinnamon, and nut.
“Naomi, can you hear me?”
A faint but steady voice boomed throughout the land. It was female, someone I recognized but could not clearly tell who.
“Hey Nao, you stupid cat! Come back to us!”
This time it was a young man’s voice. I gasped. It was Milo! Then reality all clicked together, like an easy puzzle.
Reality was bad, my kind anyways. In order to save my adorable Ariel from a sneak arrow attack, I jumped and took the hit. Surprise! In that little arrowhead, was poison, the kind that killed a person if left untreated.
How did I know? I tasted its coppery tang running through my mouth.
I screamed, demanding to join my friends. I just had to see if Ariel, and everyone else was safe.
“Ariel! Milo! Priscilla!”
“Naomi!” cried a familiar broken voice “P-please, come back!”
In a sudden impact, the world turned around, blurring my vision. My chest burst into a sudden explosion of overwhelming pain as my body registered the wound and the shock from it.
“A-Ariel” I gasped, the wound leaving me breathless ‘You’re all right”
The last thing I saw was a bright portal, before I fainted into darkness. '"
----------------
"Hmmmm, strawberry" I cried "The waffle supports it nicely"
Milo sat at the opposite side of the round table, watching me. Chewing, I noticed his chocolate waffle that had one small bite on it. Fork was on the plate.
"If you're not going to eat it, can I have it?"
Without a second thought, Milo pushed his plate towards me. I chowed it right down as soon I was finished with my strawberry.
"How can you eat so much?" Milo asked with a wide smile "Even after you just woke up with a nasty wound? You fat cat"
He was teasing me. Still, I could not help being shocked with what Milo called cat over exaggeration look.
"I'm not fat Miles!" I cried, sticking out my tongue "Just really hungry after an exhasuting nap"
Milo broke into laughter, his broad shoulders shaking with such ferocity.
Crash!
He fell over his chair. I smirked. Served him right.
"My, you okay?" I looked over the table. I felt people gaze at us nearby "Do you need help?"
My hand stuck out to reach his. Milo grabbed and pulled himself up, dusting off his dark t-shirt. His short brown hair gleamed marveouslly at the sun's rays. After we sat down, I finished the renmants of the waffle and wiped the crumbs off my face.
"So, what's the ocassion?" I asked "You never usually treat me to something sweet as this"
Milo suddenly tensed, his face displaying sadness and utmost guilt. I frowned.
"Miles, tell me!"
Our gazes met. His eyes were unreadable.
"Nao, I think we should stop. Stop all this. Us"
I blinked. That was fast, and very blunt. Shocked by his words, I gazed at him, quickening in breath. I tried to calm down, managing one word.
"Why?"
Nothing.
"Milo, tell me! If you don't like something about me - like my reckleness, I'll try to change! Just don't do this to me!"
See, it all started like this. Before the whole ordeal of the earthquake and the battle at Toronto, Milo and I have known each other since we were wee little kids. Then, five months ago, everything changed, when we reunited at the ruins, when he and Priscilla...
"Priscilla. It's her, isn't it?"
For a long time, none of us spoke. Gathering up his courage, Miles explained everything to me. During my one week vacation to candy land, my friends thought that I was never going to wake up again, body defeated by the poison. Devastated, Priscilla and Miles ended up turning towards each other for comfort. I could not bear to think of the details as Miles went on with his story. After he finished, my mind whirred for a moment, thinking.
"Well, I can't really blame you" I murmured, biting my lips to hold back the tears sweling up in my eyes "I must've looked terrible then"
"Naomi..." he began
"Can you do me one last favor?"
Blinking and utterly surprised, he slowly nodded.
"I want you to continue being my friend" I said with a weak smile "After all, we still have to see each other"
Milo silenty nodded and gave me his fuzziest smile, which told me thanks. I couldn't help it anymore, tears flowed straight through my eyes.
Before he took a good look, I ran out of the cafe, hoping he hadn't seen my pathetic cry.
----
Onwards!
Athna
"Because I obviously haven't been on here for a while"
- Said no one ever, 02/2020
>>>:
"It was nice meeting you!"
- Said a second nobody ever~
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