More Final Fantasy Fun (please, post your own!)

[jynxjaguar]

Thanks for the positive feedback on the Diaries, I will try to write more. Until then, just playing around...


Final Fantasy XII Monster Hunts
(the group runs and hides behind pillars)
Balthier: I just want to say that my opinion about hunting rare monsters has significantly changed in the past few minutes.
Fran: I think we should have paid attention to the fact that creature named Behemoth would most likely NOT be small and cuddly. (looks to Vaan) You think that should have crossed your mind when you took the job?
Vaan: I thought it was like a reverse nickname... you know, like calling a fat guy Slim
Balthier: Or calling a smart guy Vaan...
(the Behemoth starts tearing up the arena)
Fran: Anybody have a plan here?
(Balthier gets out a book and flips through it, then throws it away)
Balthier: Our online walkthrough guide doesn't say s%^&. Next time we spring for the published guide, I think we might have missed a couple of side quests.
Fran: I hate it when you pull the Fourth Wall stuff. It's cheap humor.
Balthier: You didn't complain when we used it to get you that Sagittarius bow....
Fran:.... Shut up.
Vaan: We could just run a full frontal assault, maybe we'll catch it by surprise.
Balthier: (calmly) Vaan, I can see that although that is a plan, I will not waste time critiquing the plethora of flaws in it. Suffice to say, I would be equally critical of a surgeon who plans to perform brain surgery on himself.
Fran: At least he's got a plan.
Balthier: Oh, I do, too. It's garish, it's trite and it's been used so often that it's almost stagnant, but it's a tried and true lifesaver.
Fran and Vaan: What? What? What?
(Balthier reaches into his pack and pulls out a cloth wrapped item.)
Balthier: This plan is known by many names, but here we will call it... LSG!
Vaan: What's LSG?
(Balthier unwraps the object: a PS2 controller)
Balthier: Load Saved Game! (he hits the soft reset)
(The group is standing at the last save point. Vaan and Fran look around)
Fran: Okay, THAT'S a neat trick.
Balthier: You bet. Let's go get one of those game guides, I just KNOW we missed some treasure somewhere...

[Layle]

Ok I get it
Nice job!

it is really funny man! I like it! Breaking the reality of the game was the best part!

[Layle]

Ill give iot a try
dont get mad I will proba bly suck.

[Layle]

In Giza Plains During the rains...

''So w need to get to Jahharra to meet some old dude wearing a skull on his face to get the info on some Pice of magic rock?'' i said.

''Yes Vaan I told you that already , do you listen to any thing I say?''Penelop replied

''No , its just Wat does this god forsaken Mud pit of a Plain have to do with that?''
I said

''If you want we could always try to swim there,but by the time we get there the war would be over. does that sound any better Vaan?''
Said Bathier in that stuck up voice of his.

man i hate him

''We must walk because of the Jagd that stand Between us and Jaharra.''
said Bach

''Then why not just fly around thats the fastest way right?''
I countered

For a moment everyone turned around and looked at me dumb struck as if I just turned into the worlds biggest s***.

''Vaan, why didnt you say that when we were in the city. while we were still dry!!!!!!''
Ashe started screaming at me.

''I dont know I just thought of it now .''

SPLASHHHHH-blub-blub

''What the F*** was that for!!!!!''

''Sorry that was a mean thing to do- said ashes-But i just realized it now''

Every one started laughing

I swear im going to mug and F*** her for this when we' re done

''hey Vaan, Balthaer called i Think you might want to get out now.''

Why so you can push me in , too,

''As much as i want to no, you should get out because your standing on a tortoise.''
Balthear replied

the next thin I Knew I wqas flying.The last thing i knew Is that i was falling.
Man I cant beleive I got draged into this.

[jynxjaguar]

LOL Meesa likes! More, more more!

[Layle]

cant Just got a warning from admin...
it suck big time.

[jynxjaguar]

Awwww. I'm sorry. I liked it.

[jynxjaguar]

I'll get back to Vaan and crew later, I hope... Meanwhile, to our next installment...

FF XIII

(The group is wandering the world, Fang and Vanille a little ahead)

Snow: That is one cute tail, right there.
Sazh: Fang? Yeah,I got to admit, it is one fine tush.
Snow (nervously): Yeah, yeah... Fang. Whoo wee.
Sazh (stops): You were talking about Vanille, weren't you?!
Snow: NO! Nonononono,no, NO!........yes.
Lightning: I should've known.
Snow: What?
Lightning: What the F### is wrong with you?
Snow: What do you mean?
Hope: Oh,come on, I'm a twelve year old paragon of naivete, and I know what she means.
Snow: What?
Hope: You are like, seven feet tall, and Serah is what, three foot five?
Snow: So?
Sazh: You don't see the problem?
Snow: No.
Lightning: You unbelievable b#####d!!
Vanille (from up ahead, jumping up and down, giggling): Come on, guys, adventure awaits!
Snow (distracted): God, I love it when she does that.
Sazh: Snow, you are a threat to junior high girls everywhere. Like an older Justin Bieber with gigantism.
Snow: Justin who?
Hope (sparkly eyes): Juuuussstinnn Biiiiieeeberrrrrr....
Sazh: Stay the hell away from me, boy. You got the TAINT on you!
Lightning: Great. Two people with twisted minds.
Snow: Sazh has got a chocobo living in his hair. That thing's got to eat, sleep, and most of all, poo somewhere in there.
Lightning: ...Okay, three. Thanks, Snow, I could have lived the rest of my life without ever considering that. Great, all the guys in our party are freaks.
Sazh and Snow: Hope's a guy?!
Hope: I am?
Lightning: I'm going over to X-2....