An irrational fear is a phobia
by
, 03-20-2013 at 06:34 AM (3798 Views)
And boy do I have one.
So to catch up, my computer is back online, praise be unto Hojo. I found a job working at my local Wally World in the Garden Center, doing various manly tasks that I was unaware even existed. Got denied to each university I've applied to thus far. So my mind is already a stew of stress and conflicted feelings.
Which then get stirred by a woman.
My lovely lady has begun partying again. She isn't drinking anymore, thank god, but each Friday it's somewhere new, some new friends, and I'm never invited. This week is a tipping point, since I know the host, loathe him, and she plans on staying a night in his home. I trust her indefinitely, and know I shouldn't worry, but I don't trust him. I'm not going to lie to you guys, and no one I know face to face can see this, so I think I can admit here that I'm scared of him. He's attractive, charismatic, lives on his own; he's everything I'm not. Whose to say she won't think he's better? Sure, I can wreck him if I needed to protect myself, but how will that keep her in love with me?
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooood damnit
I think I'll just stop caring. Whatever.
That works, right?
Someone please tell me it works, because it's the only option I've got left.