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The Final Voyage of the Liquid Sky

No World For Tomorrow

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by
Lacquer Head
, 02-06-2013 at 12:26 AM (997 Views)
Sorry about the recent lack of activity...I've just not been in the mood for anything...my life seems to be spiraling straight to hell...

Since we've last talked, my job had been going pretty well, I've saved up a few bucks and so on. But 2013 hasn't been kind to your old friend Lacquer Head. To start it off, my hours have been decimated, and accidentally selling gas for $0.35 a gallon sure didn't help things...My manager wont allow me to close, which is also destroying my hours. So at this point... I'm bringing in pocket change. But to top all this off, family services or whatever decided I don't need food stamps. Lost $170 a month right there. So it looks like I'll basically be working just to live.

My mental state is slowly deteriorating from copious amounts of stress and other mind ****s. Various people stringing me along and the one main crush I have developing a crush on the most pathetic piece of shit I know...it seems like everything I'm looking forward to is just crashing down around me. Nothing holds any interest for me any more. I'm desperately lonely, but I seem to be incapable of opening up to people...even though I want to make a real friend/lover, it seems people just think I'm a joke no matter what.

The one friend I had that respected me as person hit rock bottom, he was quite suicidal and finally decided to go to rehab, so I wont see him for awhile

I've had multiple people say they look up to me, like me and etc only to catch them with some one else. It seems like the only trustworthy people have no interest in me...

I can't even be ****ed to get drunk or high or anything...

Now I just feel like I'm whining...

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Comments

  1. Yoko's Avatar
    Okay okay. So, it seems like 2013 hasn't been good for you either. If you ever do feel like opening up at all, I'm here.

    I can relate to 90% of what was said. I myself have had a tough 2 weeks compared to the last 2 years. If you can't trust anyone, try looking to yourself? You spend all day with yourself and your thoughts, try taming those unruly things before trusting others. Does that make sense?

    Secondly, do what you need to do to look after yourself. I totally understand the no money issue. I spent my whole 2nd year without a job. I honestly don't know how I survived. At one point I was living off crackers, water, and adrenaline. As tough as it is, you will get through this.

    I can't think of much else to say. We members of the forum treat each other like family. I'm sure I'm not the first to say this, but if you ever need to talk to someone, someone around here is always willing to lend an ear.

  2. Lacquer Head's Avatar
    To quote Pink Floyd "Showing feelings of an almost human nature;
    This will not do."

    If you really want, I could add you to skype, but I probably wont talk about my feelings and stuff, but I can do an ask me anything or something...just try not to be too disturbed by the answers <.<
  3. Lacquer Head's Avatar
    oh, my skype name is themanofvelcro lol

    Still on dial up, so IMing shall suffice :V