No World For Tomorrow
by
, 02-06-2013 at 12:26 AM (1006 Views)
Sorry about the recent lack of activity...I've just not been in the mood for anything...my life seems to be spiraling straight to hell...
Since we've last talked, my job had been going pretty well, I've saved up a few bucks and so on. But 2013 hasn't been kind to your old friend Lacquer Head. To start it off, my hours have been decimated, and accidentally selling gas for $0.35 a gallon sure didn't help things...My manager wont allow me to close, which is also destroying my hours. So at this point... I'm bringing in pocket change. But to top all this off, family services or whatever decided I don't need food stamps. Lost $170 a month right there. So it looks like I'll basically be working just to live.
My mental state is slowly deteriorating from copious amounts of stress and other mind ****s. Various people stringing me along and the one main crush I have developing a crush on the most pathetic piece of shit I know...it seems like everything I'm looking forward to is just crashing down around me. Nothing holds any interest for me any more. I'm desperately lonely, but I seem to be incapable of opening up to people...even though I want to make a real friend/lover, it seems people just think I'm a joke no matter what.
The one friend I had that respected me as person hit rock bottom, he was quite suicidal and finally decided to go to rehab, so I wont see him for awhile
I've had multiple people say they look up to me, like me and etc only to catch them with some one else. It seems like the only trustworthy people have no interest in me...
I can't even be ****ed to get drunk or high or anything...
Now I just feel like I'm whining...