I geeve up
by
, 01-29-2013 at 10:14 PM (8156 Views)
Realist Cyan: "This will be my twenty fifth blog - and my last" T_T
Gamer girl Cyan: "Duuude. Don't get so T.O.ed, it's not personal, there just aren't that many blog readers out there yet!!!! Don't give up!!!"
Realist Cyan: "Does it occur to you that I'm speaking to different versions of myself because I don't have that many people to talk to?"
Gamer Cyan: "ya know it did."
Realist Cyan: "Good. Just checking if the world is still sane. Anyway, yeah, a small part of me thinks if I got more feedback I might feel differently - look at me, talking about 'feelings' that's progress!"
Gamer Cyan: "Props to ya, girl."
Realist Cyan: "-But there's another issue here, I realize that his illustrious majesty Micheal Swayne is a successful blogger and gets views because he's honest about what's going on in his life, it makes sense, how can I expect people to be interested in me when I haven't told them who I am, everything that's happened? and I'm just not ready to meet that level of candidity...if I ever will be. It's all too soon."
Gamer Cyan: "A-hyuk, Candidity SHOULD be a word."
Realist Cyan: "It's an ongoing crisis and I can't stop to write this stuff down or I may just realize how awful everything really is."
Gamer Cyan: "Duuude, it must be truly horrific. Would you say it's worse than...say, what other bloggers are going through currently?"
Realist Cyan: "I would not hesitate to make that affirmation if I weren't so bummed out about it. Don't wanna go there. I'm getting the urge to vomit just thinking. Let's get back on subject. My suggestion is that I stop blogging."
Gamer Cyan: "Nooo! Don't! You'll be cutting yourself off! You're already pretty isolated."
Realist Cyan: "Don't fret, I know what I need, and that's to gain my footing, and I'm not getting it done here. Other people have consistently let me down, so, inevitably, I need to return to trusting just myself."
I'll use this blog for announcing new sketches and giving links to those, but otherwise I'm taking a break. reinventing, solidifying myself, that hippy stuff..."
Gamer Cyan: "But what about my crazy urges to splurge onto a page?!?"
Realist Cyan: =_=' "Yeah, all that stuff will go back to being internalized. Don't worry, this will help both of us."
Gamer Cyan: "You are soo gonna be back next week."
Realist Cyan: "No I ain't - unless I finish a sketch"
Wish me luck, guys