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The struggle over the tyranny of my world

Homeless

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Dont let the title mislead you that far, im technically ok.

Its been 3 weeks now since I left my parebts house and all the fighting. Apart from the 'you cant leave here till you pay what you owe us' I havent heard from them at all, which is how I like it right now. Conversation leads to them critisizing me which leads to fighting. I really dont need to hear how much of a horrible person I am right now. Or do I ever.. my ego is always going to be pretty low.

Yeah, im more messed uo than usual atm. Few things are keeping me going. But I am still going. I have to find a place to stay most nights. I dont usually try that hard, but its still not a good thought. Right now I'm stuck between moving to the city or not. But I have proven to myself that its a viable option for all worlds. Ive already been driving a considerable distance to work most days, so driving down to see people is easy enough. Either way I need to decide and do it soon.

Its been a pretty difficult three weeks without seeing or really being able to talk to miss fangirl. I miss her like crazy. Ive only really briefly talked to her once/twice. I'm worried about her still, even though I'm pretty much homeless. But eh, lol. I just hope that I can make it to see her Monday. It depends if I can stay somewhere close and have work or not, but id likely go anyways. Nothing has really changed there..

Rose and I arnt talking atm, basically as soon as she got a boyfriend. I was even thinking of taking a loan and just going there, but that seems out of the question now. Its just not the right time. Right now I want to learn Japanese and go to Japan. I see now that there's a fair bit for me there in terms of discovery. Loads to see and do. Should be a good trip if I can actually save for it.

Things are rapidly changing. Game development is about to stage up to the next level, as were about to release a tech demo of the game. I feel I'm familiar enough now with the fps environment to make and valance that environment that people will like. Im pretty sure our flight style will be loved as well, as it should make everyone who can actually fly happy. Still, my main problem is a crafting system. But I figure that will fall into place later. It really needs to work well, as its pretty gamebreaking. Work well, stay in an open style (meaning it needs to be limiting the player as little as possible as well as allowing any made up style to work) and allow varience in quality based on design. Yeah, complicated. Ill get there. But apart from that, its going pretty well.

Actually, in writing this ive come up with a plan. I don't have much time to myself at the moment, so I take all I can get to think before I break down. I have a friend who might benefit a lot from my intervention if I bring him along to the city. I believe he was planning to move in with his girlfriend though, he just lacks the push. Could make a decent friend for this new age.

So, live for Mondays, develop game and plan for the future. Sounds easy enough I guess. Just depends on how easy it is to get a job I guess.

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